“Roadtripophobia (n.) The fear of not having any road trips currently booked.“
"Driving fast on the track does not scare me. What scares me is when I drive on the highway I get passed by some idiot who thinks he is Fangio."
– Juan Manuel Fangio
"Stop worrying about the potholes in the road and enjoy the journey."
– Babs Hoffman
"The devil himself had probably redesigned hell in the light of information he had gained from observing airport layouts."
- Anthony Price
“When preparing to travel, lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then take half the clothes and twice the money.”
— Susan Heller
“Never underestimate the therapeutic power of driving and listening to very loud music.”
"Help me! I'm on a family vacation!"
“The mud will wash off but the memories will last a lifetime.”
"I don't run a car, have never run a car. I could say that this is because I have this extremely tender environmentalist conscience, but the fact is I hate driving."
- David Attenborough
"The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails."
- William Arthur Ward
"Once the travel bug bites there is no known antitode, and I know that I shall be happily infected until the end of my life."
- Michael Palin
“You define a good flight by negatives: you didn’t get hijacked, you didn’t crash, you didn’t throw up, you weren’t late, you weren’t nauseated by the food. So you are grateful.”
– Paul Theroux
"You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license…"
“To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior.'”
– Rita Rudner
“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”
– Robin Williams
“Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go.”
— Truman Capote
“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.”
– Prince Philip
"Like all bad drivers, he thought he was the best driver in the world."
- Rebecca West
"Ships at a distance have every man’s wish on board."
- Zora Neale Hurston
"I have been to almost as many places as my luggage."
"If you think adventure is dangerous try routine, it’s lethal."
– Paulo Coelho
“If everything comes your way, you are in the wrong lane.”
“Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything.”
– Steve Martin
“A road trip is a way for the whole family to spend time together and annoy each other in interesting new places.”
– Tom Lichtenheld
"Why do we love the sea? It is because it has some potent power to make us think things we like to think."
- Robert Henri
"You call it a pandemonium. We call it a family vacation."
“Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead.”
— Mac McCleary
"A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest, accompanied by a mother who sees that the others get it."
— Marcelene Cox
“Thanks TSA, I haven’t been touched like that since prom night.”
— Meaghan O’Connell
"Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo."
- Al Gore
"People that insist upon drinking and driving, are putting the quart before the hearse."
– Gilbert K. Chesterton
"How can people my age plan spontaneous trips to Thailand, I can barely afford a spontaneous soft pretzel."
"Everyone’s a little bit crazy and a little bit loud. But everyone’s sharing a generous amount of love."
"You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive."
"Only on a cruise shiip will you pay hundreds of dollar a day to sleep in a closet."
“That’s why I love road trips, dude. It’s like doing something without actually doing anything.”
– John Green
"There are two kinds of travel – first class and with children."
– Robert Benchley
On Big Ben. “It’s just a big clock? I don’t understand all the hype with this clock. It is literally just a clock. It’s going to be a digital one in thirty years anyway. ”
— Montgomery Smith
“Jet lag is for amateurs.”
— Dick Clark
“The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist!”
– Russell Baker
"The main point of a cruise is to eat until you weigh the same as the boat."
"There is no unhappiness like the misery of sighting land again after a cheerful, careless voyage."
- Mark Twain
"Being on vacation with my family has brought me so much closer to my iPad."
"I love those days when my only decision is whether to go to the beach in the morning or in the afternoon."
“Whenever I travel with my 4 young kids I always forget something. Like how stupid it is to travel with 4 young kids.”
– Jim Gaffigan
"It’s bad manners to let vacation wait!"
"Yeah, working is great… but have you tried traveling?"
"When traveling with someone, take large doses of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee."
– Helen Hayes
"Love may be the best driving wheel, but anger is a pretty good second."
– Steven Tyler
"Okay, we’re all like 90% happy and 10% sunburnt."