Story

Why are dragons such good story tellers?
Because they have long tails.
I was reading a story about dragons the other day
It just seemed to DRAG ON and on.
Coming to Theaters: The thrilling tale of a man who cooked biographical books like turkey on Thanksgiving.

*Baste on a True Story...*
The national news did a story on my friend's bumper crop of green citrus fruits.
He loves being in the limelight.
I'm reading a horror story in Braille and something bad is about to happen...
I can feel it.
Vandals have attacked the National Origami Museum in Tokyo.
We'll keep you updated as the story unfolds.
Why are dragons such good story tellers?
Because they have long tails.
I was reading a story about dragons the other day
It just seemed to DRAG ON and on.
State of Education
State of Education The visiting church school supervisor asks little Johnny during Bible class who broke down the walls of Jericho. Little Johnny replies that he does not know, but it definitely is not him. The supervisor, taken aback by this lack of basic Bible knowledge, goes to the school principal and relates the whole incident. The principal replies that he knows little Johnny as well as his whole family very well and can vouch for them, if little Johnny said that he did not do it, he as principal is satisfied that it is the truth. Even more appalled, the inspector goes to the regional Head of Education and relates the whole story. After listening he replies: "I cannot see why you are making such a big issue out of this. We will get three quotations and fix the darn wall!"
“Gravity is the story of how George Clooney would rather float away into space and die than spend one more minute with a woman his own age”
Have you heard of the story about the campanologist without arms?
Doesn't ring a bell.
I am reading a horror story in Braille.
Someone is going die, I can feel it.
“Life begins at 40 – but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.”
Helen Rowland
The Priest and Businessman
The Priest and Businessman A businessman was in a great deal of trouble. His business was failing, he had put everything he had into the business, he owed everybody-- it was so bad he was even contemplating suicide. As a last resort, he went to a priest and poured out his story of tears and woe. When he had finished, the priest said, "Here's what I want you to do: Put a beach chair and your Bible in your car and drive down to the beach. Take the beach chair and the Bible to the water's edge, sit down in the beach chair, and put the Bible in your lap. Open the Bible; the wind will rifle the pages, but finally, the open Bible will come to rest on a page. Look down at the page and read the first thing you see. That will be your answer, that will tell you what to do." A year later the businessman went back to the priest and brought his wife and children with him. The man was in a new custom-tailored suit, his wife in a mink coat, the children shining. The businessman pulled an envelope stuffed with money out of his pocket, gave it to the priest as a donation in thanks for his advice. The priest recognized the benefactor and was curious. "You did as I suggested?" he asked. "Absolutely," replied the businessman. "You went to the beach?" "Absolutely." "You sat in a beach chair with the Bible in your lap?" "Absolutely." "You let the pages rifle until they stopped?" "Absolutely." "And what were the first words you saw?" "Chapter 11."
Did you hear about the panda that had a slight stutter?
Seems it’s a story that bears repeating.
A blond pushes her BMW into the gas station and tells the mechanic that it died.
After working on it for a few minutes, he has it idling smoothly.
"What's the story?" she asked.
"Just crap in the carburetor," the mechanic replied.
"How often do I have to do that?" asked the blond.
I heard a heart wrenching story recently.
A car mechanic became a cardiac surgeon.