Cats

Scientists have proven that cats have more hair on one side. Which side is it?
The outside.
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
What is worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she thought Meow Mix was a rap CD for cats.
When single ladies get to the age of 50, they tend to get lots of cats.
This phenomenon is known as many paws.
In what type of weather is the vet the busiest?
When its raining cats and dogs.
There is a specific type of cats who love to go bowling. They are known as alley cats.
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
Four Cats With Impressive Abilities
Four Cats With Impressive Abilities Four men were bragging about how smart their cats are. The first man was an engineer, the second man was an accountant, the third man was a chemist, the fourth was a Government Employee. To show off, the engineer called to his cat, "T-square, do your stuff." T-square pranced over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart. But the accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies each. Everyone agreed that was good. But the chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10-ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop. Everyone agreed that was good. Then the three men turned to the government employee and said, "What can your cat do?" The government worker called to his cat and said, "Coffee Break, do your stuff." Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, crapped on the paper, screwed the other three cats, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for Workers' Compensation and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.
Why was the man holding a bottle of ketchup? Because it was raining cats and hot dogs.
What did the caffeine addict name his cats?
Cream and Sugar.
What do cats eat for breakfast? Mice Crispies!
Why did the mouse stay inside?
Because it was raining cats and dogs.
Why did the mouse stay inside? Because it was raining cats and dogs.