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Black

A Blonde By Any Other Name
A Blonde By Any Other Name A blonde walked into an electronics store and said to the salesmen: "I want that TV." The salesperson shook his head and said, "No, we don't sell to blondes." So the blonde left and came back with her hair dyed brown and said: "I'll take that TV." Again the salesman said: "No, we don't sell to blondes." So she left again and came back with a hat, a fake nose and with her hair dyed black and said: "I want that TV." But the salesman still said: "sorry, we don't sell to blondes." Finally the blonde got fed up and said, "That's it! How do you keep guessing I'm a blonde?!" she asked. "Because that's a microwave."
One Liners and Short Jokes
A Mathematician, an engineer and a physicist were traveling through Scotland when they saw a black sheep through the window of the train.

“Aha”, says the engineer, “I see that Scottish sheep are black.”

“Hmm”, says the physicist, “You mean that some Scottish sheep are black”.

“No”, says the mathematician, “All we know is that there is at least one sheep in Scotland, and that at least one side of that one sheep is black!”
Zebra Puns
Zebras usually hold strong opinions. They are very black and white creatures.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
Dirty Short Jokes
As the nurse is making the rounds at the old folks home...
She stops by Carl's room and sees him putting black shoe polish all over his penis. Dismayed, she exclaims "no, no, no Carl, you misunderstood. I said remember to turn your clock back."
Sun Puns
A sun walks into a black hole.
The black hole says to the sun "I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation".
Chess Puns
What did Michael Jackson say to his chess opponent?
“It don’t matter if you’re black or white.”
Rock Puns
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
Pumpkin Puns
What's black, white, orange, and waddles? A penguin carrying a Jack-o-lantern.
Rabbi, We Have a Problem!
Rabbi, We Have a Problem! Two Jewish men knock on Rabbi Levi's door. "What can I do for you gentlemen?" Said the Rabbi once he opened his door. They explain to him they have an argument and cannot resolve it. The Rabbi agrees to help them. "What is the argument about?" he asks. First Man: "Black is a color!" Second Man: "NO! it is not!" First Man: "It is a color!" Second Man: "Rabbi, is black a color?" "Well, sure..." Said the confused Rabbi. First Man: "See, I told you. And so is white!" Second Man: "White is not a color!" First Man: "Rabbi?" Rabbi: "Well, yes, white is a color." First Man: "See? I told you Moishe, I sold you a Color TV!"
Quotes
“A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.”
Groucho Marx
Nurse Puns
Nurse: Are you allergic to anything?
Man: Burnt bread.
Nurse: You're allergic to burnt bread?!?
Man: Yes, I’m black toast intolerant.
Anti Jokes
What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.
What do you call someone who kills a black person?
Murderer.
Why are black people so good at basketball?
Dedication and hard work.
What’s black and white and red all over?
Red white black through tissue samples textiles for making clothes
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