“Stupid people will mistake your confidence for arrogance.”
- Habeeb Akande
“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”
- Alan Dundes
“I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder!”
Anonymous
"It is the dull man who is always sure and the sure man who is always dull."
— H.L. Mencken
"If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times: Don’t exaggerate!"
Anonymous
“Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.”
- George Benard Shaw
“Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you’ll be a mile from them, and you’ll have their shoes.”
- Jack Handey
"Don’t worry about what other people think. They don’t do it very often."
Anonymous
“Scientists say the world is made of protons, neutrons, and electrons. they forgot to mention morons.”
Anonymous
“The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.”
Anonymous
"Stupidity is like a giant car heading towards a brick wall and everyone's arguing over where they're going to sit."
“If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?”
– Scott Adams
“I am responsible for what I say but I’m not responsible for what you understand.”
Anonymous
"I'd agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong."
Anonymous
“Seriousness is stupidity sent to college.”
- P. J. O’Rourke
"The more you know, the dumber you sound to stupid people."
Anonymous
“Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.”
- Elbert Hubbard
"Don’t believe everything you think."
Anonymous
“My wife tells me that if I ever decide to leave, she is coming with me.”
- Jon Bon Jovi
“Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.”
- Albert Einstein
“There are much easier things in life than finding a good man. Nailing Jell-O to a tree, for instance.”
Anonymous
"You have no reason to fear zombies, do you?"
Anonymous
“To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it.”
- George Bernard Shaw
“If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?”
- Will Rogers
“Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can’t see.”
“Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
- Mark Twain
"Technology is getting smarter and smarter: smartphones, smartwatches, smart homes… Only people remain stupid no matter what."
- Anna LeMind
“My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”
- Chuck Nevitt
“My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.”
“I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it.”
- Edith Sitwell
"I am allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm."
Anonymous
"Better to keep silent and let people think you are a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."
- Abraham Lincoln
"I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying."
- Oscar Wilde
“It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.”
"I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth."
Anonymous
"Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it."
Anonymous
“What is the only flaw of being intelligent?…that you have to deal with stupid people.”
Anonymous
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”
- A. A. Milne
“Think of how stupid the average person is and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
– George Carlin
"If ignorance is bliss, there should be more happy people."
- Victor Cousin
"There’s nothing more tedious than seeing how a person shows his intellect, especially if there isn’t any."
- Erich Maria Remarque
“Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it’s natural.”
- Shaquille O’Neal
"Stupid is when you spend 18 hours trying to drown a fish."
Anonymous
"A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first."
"Stupidity is a talent for misconception."
- Edgar Allan Poe
“Make yourself look really stupid so you don’t feel bad doing something a little stupid.”
- Mark Hoppus
“People do not wish to appear foolish; to avoid the appearance of foolishness, they are willing to remain actually fools.”
- Alice Walker
“Every man is a d*** fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists in not exceeding the limit.”
― Elbert Hubbard
“The problem with the world is that everyone does not have a brain, but everyone does have a tongue.”
- Raheel Farooq
“When a stupid man is doing something, he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.”
- George Bernard Shaw
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