“Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can’t see.”
"I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying."
- Oscar Wilde
“Stupid people will mistake your confidence for arrogance.”
- Habeeb Akande
“To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it.”
- George Bernard Shaw
"The more you know, the dumber you sound to stupid people."
Anonymous
“The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.”
– Winston S. Churchill
"A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first."
"Stupidity has a knack of getting its way."
- Albert Camus
“I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it.”
- Edith Sitwell
“My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”
- Chuck Nevitt
"The most hopelessly stupid man is he who is not aware that he is wise."
Anonymous
"Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something."
- Plato
“I think if we tell people that the brain is an app, they will start using it.”
Anonymous
"If Cinderella’s shoe fit perfectly, then why did it fall off?"
“Scientists say the world is made of protons, neutrons, and electrons. they forgot to mention morons.”
Anonymous
“Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it’s natural.”
- Shaquille O’Neal
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”
- A. A. Milne
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has limits."
Anonymous
“Seriousness is stupidity sent to college.”
- P. J. O’Rourke
"Stupidity is like a giant car heading towards a brick wall and everyone's arguing over where they're going to sit."
“The problem with the world is that everyone does not have a brain, but everyone does have a tongue.”
- Raheel Farooq
"One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, nothin' can beat teamwork."
- Edward Abbey
“There are more airplanes in the water than there are submarines in the sky.”
Anonymous
“If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?”
- Will Rogers
"It is the dull man who is always sure and the sure man who is always dull."
— H.L. Mencken
“Every man is a d*** fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists in not exceeding the limit.”
― Elbert Hubbard
“But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.”
- Carl Sagan
“Better a witty fool than a foolish wit.”
– William Shakespeare
"You have no reason to fear zombies, do you?"
Anonymous
“There are much easier things in life than finding a good man. Nailing Jell-O to a tree, for instance.”
Anonymous
“Think of how stupid the average person is and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
– George Carlin
"I am allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm."
Anonymous
“What is the only flaw of being intelligent?…that you have to deal with stupid people.”
Anonymous
“I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder!”
Anonymous
"Common sense is not a gift. It’s a punishment because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it."
Anonymous
“My wife tells me that if I ever decide to leave, she is coming with me.”
- Jon Bon Jovi
"I'd agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong."
Anonymous
“Make yourself look really stupid so you don’t feel bad doing something a little stupid.”
- Mark Hoppus
“If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?”
– Scott Adams
"The first thing you learn in life is you’re a fool. The last thing you learn in life is you’re the same fool."
Anonymous
"Better to keep silent and let people think you are a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."
- Abraham Lincoln
"There’s nothing more tedious than seeing how a person shows his intellect, especially if there isn’t any."
- Erich Maria Remarque
“I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.”
- Walt Disney
"I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth."
Anonymous
"Don’t believe everything you think."
Anonymous
“No matter how smart you are, you can never convince someone stupid that they are stupid.”
Anonymous
“Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.”
- Elbert Hubbard
“Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment.”
- Horace
“Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.”
- Albert Einstein
"If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times: Don’t exaggerate!"
Anonymous