"An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field."
~ Niels Bohr
“Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.” – Earl Nightingale
“Be like a postage stamp. Stick to a thing till you get there.” — Josh Billings
“Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.” – Charlie McCarthy
“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar."
~ Drew Carey
“By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” — Robert Frost
“It’s a funny feeling to work with people who you consider your colleagues and to realize that they actually are young enough to be your children."
~ Alan Alda
“Saving is a very fine thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.” – Winston Churchill
“I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I’m lying. – Rita Rudner
“The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What’s the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you’d get a pulse.” — Dennis Miller
“Work is a necessity for man. Man invented the alarm clock."
~ Pablo Picasso
“Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don’t turn up at all.” – Sam Ewing
“God put me on this Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will never die."
~ Bill Watterson
“It’s a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can’t eat for eight hours; he can’t drink for eight hours; he can’t make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.” — William Faulkner
“Leaders who don’t listen will eventually be surrounded by people who have nothing to say.” – Andy Stanley
“I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need, if I die by four o’clock.” — Henny Youngman
“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.” — Groucho Marx
“If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.” — Woody Allen
“Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.” – Robert Orben
“The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” — Sarah Brown
“I used to work at McDonald’s making minimum wage. You know what thay means? You know what your boss was trying to say? It’s like, ‘Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it’s against the law.’” – Chris Rock
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.” – Mark Twain
“I believe in hard work. But, it will take some time to make this believe into a real thing!"
~ Anonymous
“Going to work for a large company is like getting on a train. Are you going sixty miles an hour or is the train going sixty miles an hour and you’re just sitting still?” — J. Paul Getty
“Unemployment is capitalism’s way of getting you to plant a garden."
~ Orson Scott Card
“The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” — Joe Girard
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend it daily.” – Zig Ziglar
“Getting paid to sleep… that’s my dream job.” –Unknown
“Lisa, if you don’t like your job you don’t strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way."
~ Homer Simpson
“People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.” – Ogden Nash
“As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. Pay day, lunch time, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and of course retirement.” — Tom Goins
“Beat the 5 o’clock rush, leave work at noon.” — Anonymous
“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.” — Mark Twain
“My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.” — Author Unknown
“I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams.” – Anonymous
“There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it?” -Kin Hubbard
“I always give 100% at Work: 10% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 22% Thursday, and 5% Friday.” –Anonymous
“A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job.” — Zig Ziglar
“It is better to have one person working with you than three people working for you.” — Dwight D. Eisenhower
“After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF.” — Anonymous
“One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."
- Groucho Marx
"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself."
~ Anonymous
“When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: ‘Whose?'” — Don Marquis
“Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor.” – John Ciardi
Don’t be distracted by criticism. Remember, the only taste of success some people get is to take a bite out of you.” – Zig Ziglar
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."
~ Douglas Adams
“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.” – Scott Adams
“It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.”- Muhammad Ali
“If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” – Betty Reese
“We pretend to work because they pretend to pay us."
~ Anonymous