When I see your face there's not a thing that I would change...
Woah! You look like I need a drink.
You must sprinkle extra sugar in your cereal in the morning...
Why, because I'm so sweet?
No, because you're really fat.
Excuse me, do you have a pen?
Then you'd better get back to it before the farmer notices you're gone.
Did you just fart?
Why, because I blew you away?
No, because you smell like sh*t.
If I could rearrange the alphabet I’d move U.
Because you’re blocking the TV.
Are you bad WiFi?
Because I'm feeling no connection here.
Are you a red light because stop.
Are you a fire detector?
Because you're loud and annoying.
I'd like to get you wet. At least long enough to get you back to the ocean.
Would you sleep with me for $100? I could really use the money.
Hey girl, are you a broom?
Why, because I swept you off your feet?
No, because you're really hairy.
You're like Newton's laws.
Not perfect, but good enough.
Do you know Santa?
Because you're not what I wanted for Christmas.
My fridge is hotter than you.
How much does a Polar Bear weigh?
I don't know.
About ten pounds less than you, fat-ass.
Ask me if I'm a tree.
Are you a tree?
No.
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