Tennis

My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.
It was like love meant nothing to her.
Just been to the funeral of a close friend who died when he was hit in the head by a tennis ball
Great service.
Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible?
When Joseph served in Pharaoh’s court.
Why is ice cream so bad at tennis?
They have a soft serve.
The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate. He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.
I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
My friend Elmer’s has gotten really good at tennis ever since he stuck to a healthier diet and went glue-ten free.
I like my breakfast like my tennis grip: Continental.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
Tennis is a lot like waiting tables. The most important thing to get right is the first serve.
There are two types of people in this world: People who love chocolate and liars. A study says that chocolate may lower your chances of a stroke. That is, a swimming stroke, a golf stroke, a tennis stroke.
A lobster's favorite shot in tennis?
The lob.
A lady sees a cowboy and says "are you really a cowboy?" The cowboy says "why yes mame, born and raised right here in Montana and have worked on the ranch since I was knee high to a pup."

The woman says " I've always wondered why cowboys always wear those big hats." The wide brim keeps the sun off'aya when it's hot and the rain off'aya when it rain'n."

"Why do you all wear vests?" Well mame, it keeps ya warm when it's cold but it leaves your arms free for rope'n and work'n."

"What about the chaps? " "They keep the burrs and brambles off'a ya."

She says "that all makes perfect sense, but what I don't understand is why you'd wear tennis shoes."

"Aww, that's easy, that's so folks don't mistake us for TRUCKERS!"