This morning Chuck Norris was shot.
Check the news, The bullet is in critical condition
Chuck Norris invented airplanes because he was tired of being the only person that could fly.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.
We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
Waldo once insulted chuck norris.
And we all know how THAT'S going.
Chuck Norris can only have Chuck Norris as babies.
Because all of his genes are dominant.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at a Burger King. He got it.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Chuck Norris caught COVID.
But then he felt bad, so he let it go.
The only time Chuck Norris was ever wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
Chuck Norris can dribble a bowling ball.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris.
The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he’s pushing the Earth down.
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
Chuck Norris has died aged 79.
But Death is too scared to let him know.
The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. Once.
Before he forgot to bring a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real.
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
It’s a little known fact that chuck Norris was dropped twice as a child.
Once on Hiroshima and once on Nagasaki.
Champions are the breakfast of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has a diary. It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
Chuck Norris can start a fire with an ice cube.
Chuck Norris caught Covid-19 yesterday
The virus is quarantined for two weeks
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
Chuck Norris was bitten by the worlds most venemous snake.
After hours of excruciating pain and misery, the snake died.
Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
What does Chuck Norris say when fishing?
"you, you and you, get out."
Chuck Norris doesn't have a roof in his house
Cold and wind don't dare come in.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
Chuck Norris doesn’t shower, he only takes blood baths.
Chuck Norris drinks napalm to fight his heartburn.
Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
Chuck Norris doesn't pet any animals. Animals pet themselves when he approaches them.
Chuck Norris can speak French... In Russian.
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris CAN touch this.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
Chuck Norris used to beat up his shadow because it was following too close. It now stands 15 feet behind him.
The Dead Sea used to be alive...
... but then Chuck Norris swam in it.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn't. The road moved back underneath him.
Chuck Norris is a coward!
If that sucker was so brave as people say he would show up here right now and smash my head against my key
Go to BabaMail
