Team

The KGB Way
The KGB Way An archeology team was having trouble determining the age of human remains that they found deep in a cave, so they called in the best forensics teams from the CIA, MI6 and KGB. The MI6 team goes in first with all their equipment and comes out about 4 hours later. "As far as we can determine, the remains are about 600,000 years old." Not to be outdone by the MI6, the CIA goes in and comes out about 8 hours later. "The remains are approximately 615,550 years old. This is what we have been able to determine with our superior forensics technology." Before the CIA is even done giving their report, the 2 man KGB team is already making their way towards the cave with nothing but a gym bag one of them is holding. They enter the cave and make their way towards the remains. Soon after, sounds of shouting, swearing and banging start coming out of the cave and they don't let up for 2 whole days. When the KGB forensics team finally leaves the cave, they are dirty and disheveled, their clothes ripped and their tools are damaged. "So, the remains are 623,118 years, 3 months, 2 weeks and 6 days old." Amazed and dumbfounded, the archeologists and other forensics teams ask how they could possible determine the age of the remains to such an exact date. The KGB agents look knowingly at each other and one of them says: "He confessed."
What is the collective noun for Ghosts? Team spirit.
What position does a ghoul play on the soccer team?
Ghoulie!
Our kids tee ball team, the Tigers, won the championship. All the parents were very proud and put in for a little statuette of the front of a tiger to give them to celebrate. When it came in, for some reason it was the back half of a tiger.
Needless to say, it was a cat ass trophy.
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
Why did the witch's team lose the cricket game?
Their bats flew away.
Q: What was the pharaoh's favorite football team?
A: The Mummy Dolphins
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
I wish you were on the football team because I'd love to see your backfield in motion.
I used to be part of a ten pin league. Our team name was 'Bowl Movement'.
What job did Dracula’s son have on his little league team?
Bat boy!
My Dear, Let Me Confess
My Dear, Let Me Confess An old football player was dying. So he called his wife and told her: "My dearest you see I'm dying. I must confess. I cheated on you twice throughout our marriage. Please forgive me." His wife says: "I forgive you my love. But I have to confess, I too have cheated on you, 3 times." "Three you say?" Said the husband, feeling like she cheated a bit more than him. "Who were they?" "Well," said his wife sweetly. "Do you remember it was so difficult to admit you as a football player in the team? So I went to the couch and did something. That was the cause for you to be a player in the team." Her husband was alarmed but he was thankful she did it for him. "Who else?" "Well, do you remember when you entered the team no body didn't pass you? I went to 10 others players so they changed a friendly treatment during half times." "You did WHAT?!" He spluttered. She continue, "And do you remember during matching nobody in town encouraged you? Well.."
Help me score one more time for team Canada?
What did the hamburger coach tell his team after they lost the first round? “You have to keep frying, you can’t give up”.
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
Large, pink birds are a good asset to a football team. They’re very used to playing flamingoalie.
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