Shouting

Stinging an Idiot
Stinging an Idiot A man comes running to the doctor shouting and screaming in pain. "Please doctor you've got to help me. I've been stung by a bee." "Don't worry;" says the doctor, "I'll put some cream on it." "You will never find that bee. It must be miles away by now." "No, you don't understand!" answers the doctor, "I'll put some cream on the place you were stung." "Oh! It happened in the garden in back of my house." "No, no, no!" says the doctor getting frustrated, "I mean on which part of your body did that bee sting you." "On my finger!" screamed the man in pain. "The bee stung me on my finger and it really hurts." "Which one?" the doctor. "How am I supposed to know? All the bees look the same to me!"
The KGB Way
The KGB Way An archeology team was having trouble determining the age of human remains that they found deep in a cave, so they called in the best forensics teams from the CIA, MI6 and KGB. The MI6 team goes in first with all their equipment and comes out about 4 hours later. "As far as we can determine, the remains are about 600,000 years old." Not to be outdone by the MI6, the CIA goes in and comes out about 8 hours later. "The remains are approximately 615,550 years old. This is what we have been able to determine with our superior forensics technology." Before the CIA is even done giving their report, the 2 man KGB team is already making their way towards the cave with nothing but a gym bag one of them is holding. They enter the cave and make their way towards the remains. Soon after, sounds of shouting, swearing and banging start coming out of the cave and they don't let up for 2 whole days. When the KGB forensics team finally leaves the cave, they are dirty and disheveled, their clothes ripped and their tools are damaged. "So, the remains are 623,118 years, 3 months, 2 weeks and 6 days old." Amazed and dumbfounded, the archeologists and other forensics teams ask how they could possible determine the age of the remains to such an exact date. The KGB agents look knowingly at each other and one of them says: "He confessed."