What is the difference between a cow that produces normal milk and a cow that produces chocolate milk? A mootation
Why did the farmer buy a brown cow? He wanted chocolate milk.
How do you know it’s cold outside? When you milk a brown cow you get chocolate ice cream.
What do you get when you cross Ice, chocolate, a big strawberry, a giant pineapple, and cold milk? The worlds best Sundae!
Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? To get chocolate milk.
How do you know it's cold outside? When you milk a brown cow you get chocolate ice cream!
A Final Word of Advice
The wise old Mother Superior from County Tipperary was dying.
The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable.
They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen.
Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened it and poured a generous amount into the warm milk.
Back at Mother Superior's bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother Superior drank a little, then a little more. Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop.
"Mother", the nuns pleaded, "Please give us some wisdom before you die."
She raised herself up in bed with a pious look on her face and said: "Don't sell that cow".
Because the platypus both lays eggs and produces milk, It is one of the few animals that can make its own custard.
The 3 Gentlemen and the Wall of Lies
Three men are walking in the desert for days, seeking a way out of the heated hellscape. There was an American, An Englishman and a Brazilian man.
After a long while they encounter a huge wall. They try to go around it, over it, but the wall is too high and too long.
They break down weeping, when the American spots a sign near the wall.
The sign reads: "You must all tell a lie in order to break this wall. The greater the lie, the greater the damage. But beware, each one of you only has one try."
The men sink into deep thinking state.
After hours of thinking, the Englishman begins: "We, the English gentlemen, never drink tea with milk."
The wall cracks.
The American adds: "We, the American gentlemen never smoke stogies after a hard day of work."
Again, the wall cracks.
Now all left up to the Brazilian man, he takes a deep breath and starts: "We, the Brazilian gentlemen-"
The wall shatters.
My cow gives less milk, now that it has been eaten, by a fierce dragon.
The Difference Between the Economies
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbour.
You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.
You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.
You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.
You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.
You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, and then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.