Three English men were walking through a desert. They were tired and thirsty but most of all hungry.
Soon, they came across a nomad with about two camels, one alive and one very much dead.
The nomad said "Hey there, you guys look hungry"
The three men all nodded.
"I tell you what, I was about to start eating this camel. I'll share it with you"
The three men soon started arguing about who gets what when one of them chimes in with a "Alright guys, how about this? Whatever football team we support dictates what part of the camel we can have."
So he goes "Well, I support Liverpool."
So he got the liver
"I support Hartlepool." said the second man.
So he got the heart.
The last guy said "I support Arsenal but I'm not hungry."
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
Why don't they teach Driver's Ed and se* education on the same day in the Middle East? They don't want to wear out the camel.
How do you rape a camel? One hump at a time.
The Nun, the Priest and the Camel
A nun and a priest were traveling across the desert and realized halfway across that the camel they were using for transportation was about to die.
They set up a make-shift camp, hoping someone would come to their rescue, but to no avail. Soon the camel died.
After several days of not being rescued, they agreed that they were not going to be rescued.
They prayed a lot (of course), and they discussed their predicament in great depth.
Finally, the priest said to the nun, "you know sister, I am about to die, and there's always been one thing I've wanted here on earth--to see a woman naked. Would you mind taking off your clothes so I can look at you?"
The nun thought about his request for several seconds and then agreed to take off her clothes.
As she was doing so, she remarked, "well, Father, now that I think about it, I've never seen a man naked, either. Would you mind taking off your clothes, too?"
With little hesitation, the priest also stripped.
Suddenly the nun exclaimed, "Father! What is that little thing hanging between your legs?"
The priest patiently answered, "That, my child, is a gift from God. If I put it in you, it creates a new life."
"Well," responded the nun, "forget about me. Stick it in the camel!"
A mother and a baby camel were talking one day when the baby camel asked, "Mom, why do we have these huge three-toed feet?"
The mother replied, "Well son when we trek across the desert, our toes will help us stay on top of the soft sand."
Two minutes later the young camel asked, "Mom, why do we have these long eyelashes?"
They are there to keep the sand out of our eyes on the trips through the desert," the mother said.
"Mom, why have we got these great big humps on our back?"
"They are there to help us store water for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without drinking for long periods of time."
"So we have huge feet to stop us from sinking, long eyelashes to keep the sand out of our eyes, and these humps to store water."
"Yes dear," said the mother.
"So why are we in the San Diego Zoo?"