"If found on ground, please drag to finish line."
From a runner's T-shirt
Step one to running a marathon: You run. There is no step two.
-Barney Stinson (How I Met Your Mother)
"Good things come slow. Especially in distance running."
Bill Dellinger
“Marathoners: Life is too easy. I must find a way to make it much much harder.”
-Glennon Doyle, best-selling author
“Oh yes I will work out today. I will work out a way to avoid running for a stupid cause.”
Stanley from The Office
"A good run is like a cup of coffee. I'm much nicer after I've had one."
Unknown
"Remember, the second most important thing to choosing the right shoe is choosing the left one."
Unknown
"I run so my goals in life will continue to get bigger instead of my belly."
Bill Kirby
"Run like you stole something."
Unknown
"Most people never run far enough on their first wind to find out they've got a second."
William James
"I don't believe in jogging. It extending your life, but by about the same amount of time you spend jogging."
Marshall Brickman
"If you run 100 miles a week, you can eat anything you want. Why? Because (a) you'll burn all the calories you consume, (b) you deserve it, and (c) you'll be injured soon and back on a restricted diet anyway."
Don Kardong
"Finland has produced so many brilliant distance runners because back home it costs $2.50 a gallon for gas."
Esa Tikkannen
"I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups."
Rita Rudner
"If God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise."
P.Z. Pearce
"I love running cross country. On a track, I feel like a hamster."
Robin Williams
"Run like hell and get the agony over with."
Clarence DeMar
"Run. Because zombies will eat the untrained ones first."
From the Zombie Apocalypse Survival Guide
"Jogging is very beneficial. It's good for your legs and your feet. It's also very good for the ground. It makes it feel needed."
Charles Schulz
"How do you know if someone ran a marathon? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you."
Jimmy Fallon