“Money often costs too much.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery." ~ Spike Milligan
“Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man’s lifetime income – which he then spends sending his son to college.” — Bill Vaughn
“I’m stuck between “I need to save money.” and “You only live once.”” – Anonymous
"If you can count your money, you don’t have a billion dollars." ~ J. Paul Getty
“I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too.” – Steve Martin
“From birth to age 18, a girl needs good parents, from 18 to 35 she needs good looks, from 35 to 55 she needs a good personality, and from 55 on she needs cash.” – Sophie Tucker
“I am not worried about the deficit. It is big enough to take care of itself." ~ Ronald Reagan
“People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.” ~ Joan Rivers
"It’s easy to meet expenses, everywhere we go, there they are." ~ Anonymus
“Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.” – Jackie Mason
"We live by the golden rule. Those who have the gold make the rules." ~ Unknown
“The waste of money cures itself, for soon there is no more to waste." ~M.W. Harrison
“Cocaine is God’s way of saying you’re making too much money.” – Robin Williams
“I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.” — Shaquille O’Neal
“You should always live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.”- Josh Billings
"I put a dollar in one of those changed machines. Nothing changed." ~ George Carlin
“I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can’t get killed by a blank?” — Milton Berle
“When a fellow says it ain’t the money but the principle of the thing, it’s the money.” – Artemus Ward
"Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate." ~ Mark Twain
“You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.” —Franklin P. Adams
"I’ve done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not." ~ Fran Lebowitz
“If you think money doesn’t grow on trees, you ain’t checking every limb.” – Chamillionaire
“If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." ~Aristotle Onassis
"Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like." ~ Will Smith
"I’m so poor I can’t pay attention." ~ Ron Kittle