Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

If I were a stop light, I would always turn red each time you pass by. In that way, I could stare at you longer.
My apologies for not flirting, I'm trying to seduce you with my awkwardness.
Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.
Do you know karate cause your body is kickin'.
My doctor told me I have a Vitamin D deficiency. Wanna go back to my place and save me?
You’re the pumpkin pie of my eye.
I like the way you espresso yourself.
Roses are red

Violets are blue

But I don't care

Cause I'm leaving you.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
I hope my love for you is arterial because I don’t want it to be all in vein.
You make me feel a lot giddier like I have eaten a box of chocolate.
Honey, do you like water? That means you already like 80% of me.
Darling, if you were cocaine I’d OVERDOSE!
Sedimentary rock has got nothing on the many layers of your amazing personality.
Ever kiss a guy with no teeth?
I can score from multiple positions.
Do you want to cosine on a mortgage with me?
I'm sorry but you need to pay your rent.
You've been living in my heart for quite some time now.
You must be calcification on a non-contrast CT, cause you’re just glowing.
The sun is up. The sky is blue. It's beautiful and so are you.
Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got FINE written all over you.
My golf number may not be that good but my phone number sure is!
I can go 90 minutes without stopping.
My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.
Are you a supermarket sample? Because I don’t want to be ashamed of tasting you over and again.
This coffee is too strong. How about a kiss because you are the only sugar I need.
I don’t know your name, but I’m sure it’s as beautiful as you are.
Is your name Summer? Because you are hot!
Except the direction I'm walking in.
I'm a maintenance engineer and I'd love to tinker with your parts.
I don't want to be alone. Help me make it through the night.
Has anyone told you you have the best smile ever? Honestly, its Nat-a-lie!
Girl: Want to see a magic trick?
Boyfriend: Sure.
Girl: Poof you're single.
When are you due back in heaven?
I don't work at this store, but may I be of assistance to you anyway?
"Going out with you would be my biggest break since the rural juror."
- 30 Rock
Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back.
Are you a bank loan? Because you got my interest!
You may be flightless but you make my heart soar.
"Do you like computers?" (yes.) "Do you like file sharing?" (yes) "Good, 'cause I'm downloadable and user friendly!"
If there a rainbow today? I just found the treasure I have been searching for!
Unicycle? Girl! How about U-‘n’-I cycle?
We may be two ships that pass in the night, but I must have your number before you Ceylon.
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
Sorry, but I can only be with you twice.
That's Now...and Forever.
Has anyone ever told you that you look like an ancient Chinese scroll? Because I can't stop looking you up and down.
Hey did you know you can’t spell Dreamy without Amy?
I feel like God's telling me that you should go on a date with me.
Are you my voice? Because I don’t want to lose you.
I like the way you espresso yourself.