Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
You can stand under my umbrella.
You must be known for you defense cause you definitely stole my heart.
Is that the sun coming up... or is that just you lighting up my world?
Wow Andrew, you seem cool an-drewly gorgeous
Ohh hey… You’re Riley cute
Baby I'm gonna teach you what love's all about tonight
You know what they say about a man with big feet... he wears big shoes.
Girl, we must be a bipartite graph, because I just thought of an efficient algorithm for finding an optimal matching for the two of us.
I do not want anything fancy just you and a whole bowl of chocolate ice cream.
You don't need an international ticket to get duty free with me.
Are you a bike? Because I wanna ride you until I get tired.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
Are you an exoplanet? Because I’m bad at astronomy and pick up lines.
Roses are red
Violets are cheaper
If I leave silent voicemails
Please don’t call me a creeper.
Were you forged in the fires of Mount Doom? Because you're precious to me.
Excuse me! Do you know where’s the Victoria's Secret shop in this mall? You look like one of their models!
I like Ronaldo, But I'd like to get Messi.
Wow, you drive me Davi
What do you say you poke-check me real quick?
Boy, are you Elvis Presley? Because lord almighty I feel my temperature rising
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
The sun must be jealous of you because you are so hot.
Do you have a tan, or do you always look this hot?
Can I have directions?
To your heart.
Hey baby, you caught my curiosity. Mind if I explore you a little?
Ruby, or not Ruby…that may be one question, but mine is actually will you go out with me?
I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
Are you German? Cuz you’re a Nein and I’m the one Ja need.
Not to be cheesy, but you’re looking really gouda.
Are you undressing me with your eyes?!
Are you sure we haven’t had a class together before? I could have sworn that we had chemistry together.
You’re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.
Honestly, I really lilac you.
Are you my favorite book? Because when I think about you I touch my shelf.
This must be decaf, cause you’re just dreamy!
You must be phylum because you seem to be above class.
I know I’m not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but one glance at you and I’m already interested.
Wanna go explore some celestial bodies together?
"Hey girl, I don't have power and success, but I'm funny."
- Modern Family
(On a rainy day) I figured out why the sky was grey today...all the blue is in your eyes.
Are you a pile of soiled dishes? Because I want to spend the entire evening with you.
Your beauty warms and lights up these frozen surroundings.
I like my girls like I like my Microsoft Word documents - Saved.
Here’s my number. Send me a text when you’re ready to fall in love with me.
I'd be Lyon to myself if I said I thought we weren't meant to be.
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
That dress would look great on my bedroom floor!
I'm a man without a country. Can I be a citizen of you?