Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
I'm gonna be on you like alligator on wildebeest.
Your feet must be tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day long.
Is this the registration table? Because I need a number from you.
Would you sit on my feet while I do push ups?
Are you a train? Because I want to be the light at the end of your tunnel.
Can you teach me how to use this machine?
Not sure what my creatinine clearance is, but I just can't get you out of my system.
I won't take no for an answer. I'm having Nunavut.
(Pick up a sugar packet off the floor) Uh, miss? I think you dropped your name tag.
I’m thinking about buying a new phone because this crappy one doesn’t have your number in it.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
"I'll always remember last night, but I think we can forget about tomorrow."
You are the hottest thing since sunburn.
Is that the sun coming up... or is that just you lighting up my world?
Why don't we head to my bedroom, peel back my Star War sheets, and discover what a true Jedi can do with his lightsaber?
I like my coffee like I like my men: either tall or with a confusing Italian name.
You're a Catch Worthy of a Gold Glove
You are unbe-Leah-vably gorgeous
My foot isn't the only part of me that's lucky!
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
I thought happiness started with an H. Why does mine start with U?
What a great match, guess you could say its my Luke-y day
Just so you know I have a ref full of chocolate, a couch and good films at my house.
Ain’t no mountain high enough to keep me from you.
I've only got three months to live.
Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.
I hope you know CPR, baby because you take my breath away.
Are you the moon? Because even when it’s dark, you still seem to shine.
You warm my heart more than the salted caramel hot chocolate on a cold winter day.
Is your name Pepsi? Because you sure are sizzling.
With me with you, anywhere becomes the perfect Champ-site.
Sorry if I seem shy or nervous around you,
I have a bit of phobia, I'm afraid of attractive people like you.
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Juno.

Juno who?

Juno I love you, don't you?
Excuse me, is it you or my coffee that’s getting my heart rate up?
You're like Newton's laws.
Not perfect, but good enough.
Was scared to approach you honestly, but I decided to take a Nata-leap of faith.
Are you a fire detector?
Because you're loud and annoying.
Call me the pace clock, cause you sure can count on me.
When I look into the future, I see you giving me your number.
Are you the perigee moon? Because I’m so attracted to you day by day.
I like 25 letters of the alphabet
But I love U.
Hey baby, how many Gamma-ray bursts can your Milky Way take?
I’m a 30-60-90 triangle and you’re a 40-40-90 triangle – we’re just right for each other.
Your infectious smile puts cholera to shame.
I'm Havana dream about you.
I was blinded by your beauty...
I’m going to need your name and phone number for insurance purposes.
You be the battery, I’ll be the aluminum foil and together we’ll light up the world.
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
Are you cold? You look like you could use some hot chocolate… Well, here I am!