Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I’m invisible. [Really?] Can you see me? [Yes]. How about tomorrow night?
What's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?
Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.
You're like baseball: A thinkin' man's game.
You might not be America’s Most Wanted, but you’re at the top of my Watch List.
My magical watch says you aren’t wearing any panties. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!
What’s your go to order at a bar? Mine is A Big Ale
Are you from South England? Cause you Brighton up my day.
Is your name Faith?
Because you're the substance of things I've hoped for.
Is your nickname Mercury? Cause you look habitable.
Are you sure we haven’t had a class together before? I could have sworn that we had chemistry together.
Do you wanna go to a restaurant?
You can't spell “menu” without me and u.
Girl, if I am epsilon, will you be my delta?
If I could rearrange the alphabet I’d move U.
Because you’re blocking the TV.
Do you like sub-bass? Because you just turn on my lower frequencies.
If you were a basketball, I'd never pass because I want to keep you all to myself.
What's your name? Because I'll be screaming it all night long.
You remind me of a thunderstorm: positively striking.
"I treated this relationship like my diet, one cheat day a week."
Hey, wanna come to my place and observe something else that's constantly expanding?
You must be a flip turn because I’m head over heels for you.
My love for you is like a fruitcake during the holidays - nutty, spicy and unavoidable, no matter how hard you try.
What are your times? Because I can show you the time of your life.
Let’s act like we’re a couple of colonists and do a few intolerable acts together.
I love your energy.
When are you due back in heaven?
You shouldn't wear make up, baby.
It's messing with perfection.
I'm not a hipster, but I could make your hips stir.
Hi, Cupid just called. He wanted me to tell you that he needs my heart back. Would you do that?
I don't want to make the faux-paw of coming on strong, but your dog is so adorable, I couldn't resist.
I know a fun activity that can burn 500 calories an hour...
May I ride your broomstick? I lost mine.
I am lucky we are hiking together this evening.
If you go out with me, I promise I won’t take you for granite.
You have changed my world to polar coordinates. Complex and imaginary things now have a magnitude and direction.
I like you cherry much.
"Look, our relationship is like doing push ups on your knees. It's just not working out"
You can tickle my ivories anytime, baby.
Baby you got the perfect route for me.
I wish I was a pronoun so I could be the direct object of your affection!
There’s snow one like you.
My love for you is like the Spanish Armada – unsinkable!
You and I could totally melt my igloo.
The pool water isn’t very hot but you sure are.
Ever kiss a guy with no teeth?
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Don't add honey to your tea. You are already sweet enough!
Hey baby, how many Gamma-ray bursts can your Milky Way take?
My heart is as desolate as Saskatchewan without you.
Hey how’s it going? Ben jammin’ much today?