Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I'm no curler, but I think I could sweep you off your feet!
Roses are red, my face is too, this only happens when I cycle with you.
If your heart was a prison, I would want to be sentenced to life.
You can shiver my timbers anytime.
I'm having a sale in my bedroom. My clothes are 100% off.
Hi, I'm the Easter Bunny and I don't care if you are naughty or nice!
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
You're the second greatest thing to happen to me. Jesus being the first.
Is this a catch and release fishing session? Because I don't want to let you go.
Yo baby, you want to see me solve a quadratic?
Man: Your face must turn a few heads!
Woman: And your face must turn a few stomachs!
I can tell what a woman drinks just by looking at her, and for you it's a diet coke.
You are the best compression gear because you made my blood flow.
I’d be Ju-lyin’ if I said you weren’t super cute
Did you know I’m a flower? Because I just need somebudy like you.
Do you have a jersey? Because I need your name and number.
You can count on the stars, but you can’t ever count on how much I miss you.
Oh no, I'm choking! I need mouth to mouth, quick!
Are you an exoplanet? Because I’m bad at astronomy and pick up lines.
(give a dozen plastic roses) "I'll stop loving you, when these roses die.
Of all the rocks in the world, I’d pick you.
I’ve always thought that heck is the only thing hotter than the sun but that has all changed today.
Do you also feel the strong gravitational pull of my bed?
Call me Joshua, because I'm going to break down your walls.
Girl, we must be a bipartite graph, because I just thought of an efficient algorithm for finding an optimal matching for the two of us.
I'm just like a dumpling. I have fillings for you.
If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever.
Hi, my name's Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
Man: Do you think it was fate which brought us together?
Woman: Nah, it was plain bad luck!
Wanna see my norwegian wood?
Your eyes are as blue as the sea after a storm.
This match sure has me feeling Victori-ous
I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran my boat into yours. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
Lady, you mak me All Shook Up and wake my Animal Instinct
I know hundreds of Pi digits, but what I really want to know is the 7 digits of your phone number.
Are you an angle? Because you're so acute.
Hello, eh. Girl your soft brown eyes remind me of the amazing beaver, eh.
I'm doing yoga tonight but I rather be doing you.
Are you Jewish? Cause you IS RAELI HOT.
If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I'd have a galaxy in my hand.
I think we'd make a cute pear.
I could never Passover you.
Ommmm... let's meet up in our spirit form.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
You’ve got beauty like Petit Champlain and curves like Bonhomme.
Are you a Pepsi? Because you're so-da-licious!
I could say that I wandered lonely as a cloud before I met you, but what are these Wordsworth if you won't go out with me?
Call me Ishmael. Or just call me.
If you were to be as rich as your number, how much are you worth?
When I see you, I feel like I am going to reach my melting point.