Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

Will you let me be the avocado in your turkey sandwich?
I want you more than I want world peace.
Hey girl, are you gold? Because I'm in Au of your beauty.
Hey pumpkin – I bet I can put a smile on your face.
I was blinded by your beauty...
I’m going to need your name and phone number for insurance purposes.
Would you like to come over for tea and crumpets?
Damn girl, you're lookin' sharp
You shift my emotional oxy-hemoglobin saturation curve to the left! Easy to bind, hard to let go...
Can you run with me so I can tell my friends I've ran with an angel?
Old Man: "Where have you been all my life?"
Woman: "For the first half of it, I wasn't even born yet."
Are you the World Cup? ‘Cause I get excited just waiting for you.
Hey girl, I've been warming up this bench for you my whole life.
Baby, you've bought yourself a cruise on the Love Boat. I'll be your captain.
Hey, I just got my flight number. I’m just missing your phone number.
Girl, are you a swimming cap? Because you’re always on my head.
You must be regulated by the FDA because you treat, cure, and prevent my broken heart.
You can count on the stars, but you can’t ever count on how much I miss you.
"We are like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it."
Your eyes look like dark black holes, buI can't help but to be drawn in.
If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I would be holding a galaxy.
Are you a sheep cause your body is unbaaaaalievable.
You can stand under my umbrella.
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
Angels could fly, but I didn't know they could run.
My Spotify sucks. It showed me the hottest singles, and missed you out!
I bet you’re really flexible.
Baby, you're just like water ...
Except Jesus turned you into fine.
Why don’t we use some Fourier analysis on our relationship and reduce to a series of simple periodic functions?
Sorry I took so long to call, I accidentally got lost in your eyes.
Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control cause I just saw a fox!
Are you a practice room? Because I want you and I hope you're not taken
Heya, howl you doin'? Yikes, sorry, that was a ruff start.
Get that red light ready, because you and I are about to score.
My love for you is like the universe… never-ending!
Can you feel that universal energy flowing from me to you?
We fit together like a gitch in a wedgie.
If I walked a milimeter for everytime I thought of you, I would have walked across the Earth a million times.
Excuse me, may I have this mating dance?
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
Fall hardly happens here, but You'll be falling for me.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Stop Stalin and let’s hook up.
Damn girl, I must be an elephant. Because I'd never forget you.
Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.
Hey girl. Feel my sweater. Know what it’s made of? Husband material.
Cute dog in your pics! Can I have his number?
Would you like to share fire with me?
Every function without you will always be void of love.
All this lidocaine and I still have feelings for you.
Give me your number so I can make the call.