Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I think you are suffering from a lack of Vitamin Me.
Are you a bank loan? Because you got my interest!
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Hey girl, I hope you see that I'm not like all the otters!
Are you from pennsylvania cause I want to stick my pen in your sylvania.
I lost my future girlfriend's phone number.
I think you might have it.
You're like a dictionary - you add meaning to my life!
I need more than 140 characters to tell you how beautiful you are.
Hey baby, how many Gamma-ray bursts can your Milky Way take?
We aren't even in hot yoga, but you have me sweating.
If I can't score, can I at least get an assist?
If you were a puck, I'd never shoot. Because I would always miss you.
You must be the iceberg from Titanic and I'm the ship because tonight we're gonna smash.
Help! I need your number in my long-term memory.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice.
Girl you must have swallowed a speaker, cause your beauty is louder than the rest
Are you a lateral pterygoid because you make my jaw drop.
Are you a doughnut? Because I find you a-dough-rable.
(give a dozen plastic roses) "I'll stop loving you, when these roses die.
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Do you live on Mars? ‘Cause, you look out of this world.
I think I glove you.
Have you ever been fishing in Lake Michigan? 'Cause we should hook up sometime.
"I don't bite, you know... unless it's called for."
- Audrey Hepburn, Charade (1963)
How about we play a fun game called Haida totem pole?
My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.
If you look at the map of my heart, it says 'You are here.'
If I supply the voltage and you supply the resistance, imagine the currents we can make together.
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Aldo.

Aldo who?

Aldo anything for you.
You are so good at jogging, you came straight for my heart.
Excuse me, I think I'm lost. Is this the bar or the musem? You're just a piece of art.
Your smile is brighter than the fireworks on the 4th of July.
I am looking for a leash-free relationship.
Arrrr. Wanna search me for buried treasure?
You seem to be traveling at the speed of light because time always seems to stop when I look at you.
Is there a science room nearby, or am I just sensing chemistry between us?
You can call me Jonah.
Because I'm going to show you a whale of a time.
"Hey girl, I don't have power and success, but I'm funny."
- Modern Family
Hey, I don’t know what you think of me but I hope it’s X-rated.
How about we get down to monkey business?
What a great match!..I hope when you see my message you don’t give it Ah-big-ail no and leave me hanging
How much will $20 get me?
"You are adorable, mademoiselle. I study your feet with the microscope and your soul with the telescope."
― Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
Sir William Howe... are you doing?
I don't care *how* many items you've got, baby, I could check you out all day long!
I’ve always thought that heck is the only thing hotter than the sun but that has all changed today.
Did you overstay your visa? Because you got 'fine' written all over you
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Butch.

Butch who?
Butch your arms around me and give me a hug.
If you date me, you'll eventually see a diamond.