Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

Roll over. I'll scratch your belly.
Want to ge together sometime and make Double Trouble?
Did my Spotify playlist glitch? Because you are the only song I hear.
Once you finish deep breathing, do you want to start panting?
For you, I would slay two Goliaths.
Baby, you're so hot it's got to be at least Fahrenheit 451 in here.
Are you a pulmonary embolism? Because you take my breath away.
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
This coffee is too strong. How about a kiss because you are the only sugar I need.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Are you wi-fi? Cause I’m totally feeling a connection.
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
I know that 70% of the human body is composed of H2O, but the tall drink of water I'm looking at is probably 97%.
I'll feel more comfortable sleeping at night once I have your number.
I wish I was an ion, so I could form an exothermic bond with you.
You are the object of my preposition.
Your body must be made of oxygen and neon because you are the One.
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
Are you a baker? ‘Cause those buns look TASTY.
I’m not part of the Prohibition Movement. You can speakeasy to me.
I put the ‘laid’ in Adelaide.
Can I get your number?
One call, that's all.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You make my heart skip, I think I have Mobitz type II!
Mind if my comet enters your solar system?
Excuse me, I believe one of your ribs belongs to me.
Hey, I found you! You are the girl of my dreams.
If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
Not even Fahrenheit, Celsius, or Kelvin can measure how hot you are!
Hey girl, are you on the endangered species list? 'Cause baby you are one of a kind!
I feel like we’re developing some good chemis-tree.
Angel, I want to run all the way with you.
If you gave me a penny for my thoughts I’d have just one penny, because i only think about one thing and that’s you.
Sorry I'm so quiet this evening. You simply took my breath away.
You're a good egg.
I just got some mistletoe, how about we go back to my place and try it out?
Excuse me, would you like a raisin? No? How about a date then?
I need an Imodium because I can't hold in my love for you.
Are you a model?
Are you a carbon sample? Because I want to date you.
My love for you is like this hike. It goes on and on.
Are you the energizer bunny cause you just keep going and going through my mind.
You make me want to Twist and Shout
You’re like the perfect audition piece: rare, beautiful, and extremely worth it.
Jedi Mind Trick: "This is the geek you're looking for." waves hand.
If I told you you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
May I tie your shoe?
Because I can't have you fall for anyone else.
If we're going to make love later, you should probably be there.
Sorry for not calling sooner, I was budy complaining to Spotify for not naming you the year's hottest single.
Is it hot in here or am I just wearing two pairs of long johns?
Are you a pot-head? Because weed be cute together