Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I've got a Victrola in my bedroom. Want to listen to my Sinatra records together? We could slow dance
Man: I'd go to the ends of the world for you!
Woman: Okay, but would you stay there?
I think you might be a star because I can’t stop orbiting around you.
Are you a can of bear spray? ‘Cause you really spice things up around here.
I'm sorry I wasn't around in the past. Can I be part of your future?
Do you like vegetables because I love you from my head tomatoes.
Man: "Wow, you're tall! How's the weather up there?"
Woman: "It's raining." and pour a glass on him.
Wanna meet up tonight? I hope you Leonard-on’t say no
It's been a hard day's night without your lovin', Oh darling.
Your beauty is a singularity. The force of attraction between us is so powerful.
I know my math. And you’ve got one significant figure!
We aren't even in hot yoga, but you have me sweating.
If you go out with me, I promise I won’t take you for granite.
You sweep me off my feet!
When are you going to invite me to church?
I was working on my family history. Do you think it's too early to list you as a spouse?
Hey boy, I like your Irwin inspired outfit.
You heard right: I only take off this mask for two things. Eating.
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Is your name Succinylcholine? Because you’re paralyzing.
This is too cliché, dear, but this is what I really feel, I love you to the moon and back.Copy0
Are you into salads? Because I think I'm falling in lovage.
You're like a dictionary - you add meaning to my life!
You must be Australian because you've turned my life upside-down.
I really caribou-t you.
She acts like summer and walks like rain.
Roses are red, my face is too, this only happens when I cycle with you.
"I'm not a stop along the way. I'm a destination."
- Gossip Girl
You're my eggnog: sweet, chill, and delish.
Pretty lady, I guess wishes do come true, seeing as a boy like me met a a girl like you.
If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
Baby, you're so sweet you'd put Hershey's out of business!
I'm lactose intolerant so please keep your cheesy pick up lines away from me.
Do you know what I did last night? I put Easter eggs in a heart shape for you to find!
Cute dog in your pics! Can I have his number?
Is your name Ariel? Because we mermaid for each other.
If I were a cat, I'd spend all 9 lives with you.
I need more than 140 characters to tell you how beautiful you are.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Ike.

Ike who?

Ike can rock your world, baby.
I can turn your software into hardware.
Here in Australia it's already tomorrow, wanna know what we did last night?
What’s the best part of the cell, next to the cytoplasm? The nucle-US.
I hope you're ready to spend some koalaty time together.
Hey there cyclist, do you need to use my pump?
Are you undressing me with your eyes?!
You must be a 90º angle. ‘Cause, you’re looking right!
Angel, I want to run all the way with you.
You’re just like how I like my potatoes — sweet.