"I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach."
"If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I wear a size 7-day Caribbean cruise."
“This is the first year I’m not going to Fiji because of COVID-19. Normally, I do not go because I am poor.”
— Brooke Miller
“The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.”
– Dave Barry
"Okay, we’re all like 90% happy and 10% sunburnt."
"You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license…"
"I crossed a time zone and I feel younger already. If I keep traveling west, I can become immortal."
- Jarod Kintz
"By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always traveling & comes to family events tipsy."
Of all the books in the world, the best stories are found between the pages of a passport.
"Getting out of bed would be 10x easier if there was a Caribbean ocean and 30 degree weather waiting outside for you."
"Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-brake on."
- Maxwell Maltz
"Love may be the best driving wheel, but anger is a pretty good second."
– Steven Tyler
“When preparing to travel, lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then take half the clothes and twice the money.”
— Susan Heller
"I want to live in the world where searching for plane tickets burns calories."
“Never underestimate the therapeutic power of driving and listening to very loud music.”
"Driving fast on the track does not scare me. What scares me is when I drive on the highway I get passed by some idiot who thinks he is Fangio."
– Juan Manuel Fangio
“I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.”
– Steven Wright
“Until you’ve learned to drive, you’ve never really learned how to swear.”
— Robert Paul
"I get pretty much all the exercise I need walking down airport concourses carrying bags."
- Guy Clark
“Life is like pocket money. You shouldn't spend it all in one place.”
― Julian Talbot
"I don't run a car, have never run a car. I could say that this is because I have this extremely tender environmentalist conscience, but the fact is I hate driving."
- David Attenborough
"People complain that there are delays on flights. Delays, really? New York to California in five hours, that used to take 30 years."
- Louis C.K.
“Because the greatest part of a road trip isn’t arriving at your destination. It’s all the wild stuff that happens along the way.”
– Emma Chase
"Only on a cruise shiip will you pay hundreds of dollar a day to sleep in a closet."
“I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying!"
"Backpacking is money spent on education."
“The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist!”
– Russell Baker
"There are good ships
and wood ships
and ships that sail the sea.
But the best ships
are friendships
and may they always be."
"What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?"
- George Carlin
“Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”
- Douglas Adams
“Driving at night is about communicating with lights.”
— Lukhman Pambra
"If you think adventure is dangerous try routine, it’s lethal."
– Paulo Coelho
"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."
– George Burns
“Aerodynamics are for people who can’t build engines.”
– Enzo Ferrari
“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.”
– Prince Philip
"There are only two emotions on a plane: boredom and terror."
- Orson Welles
"I’m a travel fiend on the road to recovery. Just kidding. I’m headed to the airport."
"The main point of a cruise is to eat until you weigh the same as the boat."
"I love those days when my only decision is whether to go to the beach in the morning or in the afternoon."
"Everyone’s a little bit crazy and a little bit loud. But everyone’s sharing a generous amount of love."
“Road Trips: Because they’re cheaper than therapy.”
"Ships at a distance have every man’s wish on board."
- Zora Neale Hurston
“I’ve had entire relationships that didn’t get as far as these airport security checkpoints.”
— Michael LeRoux
"You call it chaos. We call it a family vacation."
“You’re not truly a parent until you’ve yelled at your kid for drinking fluid on a road trip because now they have to pee again.”
— Abe Yospe
“Money may not buy happiness, but I’d rather cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.”
– Francoise Sagan
"The devil himself had probably redesigned hell in the light of information he had gained from observing airport layouts."
- Anthony Price
"We travel, initially, to lose ourselves, and we travel, next to find ourselves."
- Pico Iyer
“The mud will wash off but the memories will last a lifetime.”
“Jet lag is for amateurs.”
— Dick Clark
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