“Going to work for a large company is like getting on a train. Are you going sixty miles an hour or is the train going sixty miles an hour and you’re just sitting still?"
~ J. Paul Getty
“Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.” — George Carlin
“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.” – Scott Adams
“Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you’re finished.” — Leslie Nielsen
“People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.” – Ogden Nash
“Anyone who can walk to the welfare office can walk to work."
~ Al Capp
“If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings.” – Dave Barry
“Lisa, if you don’t like your job you don’t strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way."
~ Homer Simpson
“Education cost money. But then again so does ignorance.” – Sir Claus Moser
“I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin
“My job is fun! I should change this line once in a while. My brain has started to realize that I am lying to it every morning."
~ Anonymous
"Show me a man who is a good loser and I’ll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss."
~ Jim Murray
“I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams.” – Anonymous
“I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.” — Bill Gates
“Like vinegar to the teeth, and smoke to the eyes, so are the lazy to their employers.” – Proverb 10:26
"Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get."
~ Ray Kroc
“I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need, if I die by four o’clock.” — Henny Youngman
“It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong.” — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
“It’s a funny feeling to work with people who you consider your colleagues and to realize that they actually are young enough to be your children."
~ Alan Alda
“The problem with doing nothing is that you never know when you’re finished.” – Groucho Marx
“Nothing is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn’t be done.” – Sam Ewing
“Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.” — Will Rogers
“Hear no evil, see no evil, and speak no evil—and you’ll never get a job working for a tabloid.” – Phil Pastoreta consultant.” – Scott Adams
“If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.” — John Gotti
“Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.” — Don Herold
"Everybody makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when no one is looking."
~ Anonymous
“The reward for good work is more work.” – Francesca Elisia
“God put me on this Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will never die."
~ Bill Watterson
“One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.” — Bertrand Russell
“It is better to have one person working with you than three people working for you.” — Dwight D. Eisenhower
“The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What’s the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you’d get a pulse.” — Dennis Miller
“Time is an illusion. Lunchtime is doubly so.” – Douglas Adams
“The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” — Joe Girard
“No man goes before his time—unless the boss leaves early.” — Groucho Marx
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend it daily.” – Zig Ziglar
“Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."
~ Erma Bombeck
“My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.” — Author Unknown
“Saving is a very fine thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.” – Winston Churchill
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."
~ Douglas Adams
"An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field."
~ Niels Bohr
“Most of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to get their work done.” — Peter Drucker
"Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy."
~ Huey Long
“It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.”- Muhammad Ali
“Pride, commitment and teamwork are words they use to get you to work for free.” – Anonymous
“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it.” — Groucho Marx
“You can’t have a million dollar dream with a minimum wage worth ethic.” — Zig Ziglar
“It’s a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can’t eat for eight hours; he can’t drink for eight hours; he can’t make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.” — William Faulkner
“We pretend to work because they pretend to pay us."
~ Anonymous
“Coworkers are like Christmas lights. They hang together, half of them don’t work and the other half aren’t so bright.” – Anonymous
“Work is a necessity for man. Man invented the alarm clock."
~ Pablo Picasso
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