“If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”
― Unknown
“My mind says ‘abs’ but my heart says ‘cheese fries’.”
― Unknown
“Every day is National Donut Day if you put your mind to it.”
― Unknown
“The only clubs I’m interested in are sandwiches.”
― Unknown
“Abs are temporary. Chocolate is forever.”
― Unknown
“There’s no “we” in ice cream.”
― Unknown
“A pizza slice a day keeps sadness away.”
― Jet Paacal
“Those pizzas I ate were for medicinal purposes.”
― Amy Neftzger
“Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.”
― Andrew W.K.
“Every pizza is a personal pizza if you try hard and believe in yourself.”
― Bill Murray
“Pizza is like the entire food pyramid!”
― Madeline Oles
“Unless you are a pizza, the answer is yes, I can live without you.”
― Bill Murray
“You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not pizza.”
― Unknown
“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
― Anthony Bourdain
“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart.”
― Erma Bombeck
“Red meat is not bad for you. Now, blue-green meat—that’s bad for you!”
— Tom Smothers
“Love and sausage are alike. Can never have enough of either.”
— Trixie Koontz
“The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.”
— John Walters
"I just want someone to look at me the way I look at food."
— Unknown
"I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge."
— Unknown
"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt."
— Charles M. Shulz
"If we shake out all of the crumbs from all of the keyboards in the world, we can end world hunger."
— Matthew Dolkart
"When you see a couple walking down the street holding hands and laughing, you look over to your side and the only thing you're holding is a half-eaten sandwich."
— Violet Matters
"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."
— Mark Twain
"Never eat more than you can lift."
— Miss Piggy
"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand."
— Barbara Johnson
"Your diet is a bank account. Good food choices are good investments."
— Bethenny Frankel
"Snack time heals all wounds."
— Bridger Winegar
"Wait. Why am I thinking about Krispy Kremes? We're supposed to be exercising."
— Meg Cabot
"Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face."
— Enrico Caruso
"Anything is good if it's made of chocolate."
— Jo Brand
"I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks."
— Totie Fields
"Promises and pie-crust are made to be broken."
— Jonathan Swift
"Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is."
— P. J. O'Rourke
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap."
— Kevin James
"I'm not sure what makes pepperoni so good if it's the pepper or the oni."
— Ulrik Stephens
"The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again."
— George Miller
"Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don't forget food. You can go a week without laughing."
— Joss Whedon
"I'll have a double cappuccino, half-caf, non-fat milk, with enough foam to be aesthetically pleasing, but not so much that it would leave a mustache."
— Niles Crane
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
"Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!"
— Roald Dahl
"Americans will eat garbage provided you sprinkle it liberally with ketchup."
— Henry James
"Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon."
— Doug Larson
"Never order barbecue in a place that also serves quiche."
— Lewis Grizzard
"As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it."
— Buddy Hackett
"At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom."
— George Carlin
"A slice of pie without cheese is like a kiss without a squeeze."
— Stephen King
"The 12-step chocoholics program: Never be more than 12 steps away from chocolate!"
— Terry Moore
"Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie."
— Jim Davis
"Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."
— Mark Twain