Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
Are you a durian? Because you're a total snack, but you smell like rotting flesh.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Honestly, I'm into necrophilia. Wanna come home and play dead?
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
I dreamt about you. You died.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
I bet your muffled screams are as cute as u.
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
How hot does your gas oven get?
For a fatty, you don't seem to sweat much.
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
You're the thought that counts!