Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
How much will $20 get me?
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
How hot does your gas oven get?
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
Are you a durian? Because you're a total snack, but you smell like rotting flesh.
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
You smell. We should go take a shower together.
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
Pies aren't the new cupcakes, baby. You are.
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
I bet your muffled screams are as cute as u.
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
For a fatty, you don't seem to sweat much.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
Honestly, I'm into necrophilia. Wanna come home and play dead?
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.
Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.