“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive.”
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“I really don’t play well with others on a Monday. Can I skip today and just start again with Tuesday?”
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“The only certainty in this life is that Monday comes for everyone. A little humor to face at the beginning of the week always goes well. How about starting Monday smiling?”
“Monday I shall slay thee with my mighty cup of coffee.”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“Monday should be optional.”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
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