“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
“Monday I shall slay thee with my mighty cup of coffee.”
“Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
“I really don’t play well with others on a Monday. Can I skip today and just start again with Tuesday?”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“I hate mornings and Mondays. And working. But other than that I am entirely happy.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“The only certainty in this life is that Monday comes for everyone. A little humor to face at the beginning of the week always goes well. How about starting Monday smiling?”
“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Mondays. Don’t worry, you’re regularly scheduled happiness will resume again on Friday.”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“Monday should be optional.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive.”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“At the end of a rainbow, there’s a pot of gold. But when the weekend comes to an end, there’s only a Monday.”
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“You are in control. Never allow your Monday to be manic.”
— Andrea L’Artiste
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“Good morning. Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
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