|
A son moves away to go to college and takes his leave of his family and the the family dog, blue. A few months later, his father gets a call from his son. "Dad," he says, "there's an amazing program here that teaches dogs to talk!" 'That's amazing!' his Dad says. 'How do I get Blue in that program?' 'Just send him down here with $2,000,' the son says, 'I'll get him in the course.' So his father sends the dog and $2,000. About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home. 'So how's Blue doing, son?' his father wants to know. 'Awesome! Dad, he's talking up a storm... But you just won't believe this. They've had such good results with talking, they've begun to teach the dogs how to read.' 'Read?' exclaims his father. 'No kidding! How do we get Blue in that program?' 'Just send $4,500. I'll get him in the class.'
Then, finally, he comes up with a plan. First he gives the dog to a nice family. Then he goes home at the end of the year, his father is all excited. 'Where's Blue? I just can't wait to talk with him, and see him read something!' 'Dad,' the boy says, 'I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Blue was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal. Then he suddenly turned to me and asked, 'So, is your dad still seeing that little redhead barmaid at the pub?'' The father groans and whispers, 'I hope you shot that bastard before he talked to your Mother!' 'I sure did, Dad!' 'That's my boy!' The lad went on to be a successful lawyer. |
Joke: The Magic Scales
A woman goes over to a weight machine while waiting for a bus. To her amazement, the machine talks back to her and appears to be able to predict the future...
Joke: The Talking Dog and the Bartender
A guy walks into a bar with his dog and says, "I'll have a Scotch and water and my dog would like a whiskey sour."
168 Dad One-Liners So Bad They’re Good
These aren't just jokes; they're a rite of passage, a tradition as old as fatherhood itself. Whether you're a dad looking to expand your arsenal of cringe-inducing humor or someone who secretly loves a good (bad) pun, this collection has you covered.
Joke: The Odd Driver
When a cop pulls over a man for speeding, little does he know what he's in for...
Some Days at Work are Funnier Than Others...
Sometimes, the office provides its own unique brand of comedy gold...
16 Hilarious Photos You Have to See to Believe
People leave you wondering where on Earth they got a certain idea that they had. These 16 photos really need to be seen to be believed.
Hilarious: What if the Buddha Was Jewish?
What would the Buddha say if he were Jewish? These quotes are hilarious!
This Photographer Knows How to Get Humor Out of His Shots!
It's the simplest things in life that make me laugh. Like these 23 brilliant photos of dogs chasing treats! Priceless.
2:07
Adorably Funny: These Dogs Never Saw it Coming...
When these dogs get pranked, they can't believe it!
These Funny Quote Mistakes Say More Than Intended
A misused quotation mark can send a completely different message than was intended, as you will see in these pictures.
Hilarious: Classic “Why Me?” Photo Moments
Anyone can relate to these funny 'bad day' photos. Sometimes luck just isn't on our side...
3:03
Stand-up Comedy: What Men Really Think of Their Marriage
Marriage is certainly a blessing we all appreciate. But that doesn't mean we can't have a good laugh about it! This portrayal is cynical, but deadly funny!
This Girl Has Some Complaints About the Mom "Model"
This funny little story gives us a unique look at a mother-daughter relationship.
Laughter by the Numbers: Life in Comic Statistics
Raf Schoenmaekers combined his love for digital art and engineering background to tell some truths using graphs in this funny comics.
8:59
You Can’t Help But Smile at These Overdramatic Pets
These hilarious pets can't stop being dramatic!
Prime Examples Of Just How Strange the English Language Is
The English language is filled with numerous strange sequences and things that don't make sense like this fascinating and funny tidbits
3:15
Cat Falls In Love With a Cucumber - Hilarious Video!
Most cats are either indifferent or terrified of cucumbers. But Mauri is no ordinary cat...
These Guys Really Thought This Was a Good Idea...
Women usually live longer than men and the following photographs show exactly why! Take a look!
Hilarious – Kids vs. Common Sense: Who Wins?
These photos capture the chaotic energy of childhood.
10:06
These Goofy Cats Will Have You Howling with Laughter
Though typically reserved and dignified, cats can be hilarious, bounding across the house chasing after invisible prey.
The Wit of Mark Twain: Quotes that are Amusing and True
One of the most famous American writers, Twain was known for his wit and darker humor. To this day, his quotes are an inspiration.
These Funny Photos Show Spelling at Its Wildest!
Look, if you're going to be writing something in public, it needs to be spelled correctly - doesn't it? Here are 21 ridiculous English errors.
Excuse Me, But Are These Signs for REAL???
Who comes up with these hilarious ideas and useless ideas for signs?
Funny Moments You’ll Only Ever See in Australia
Australia is pretty unique, so good luck finding photos like these anywhere else...
There's a Senior Version of the Alphabet, and It's Hilarious
They usually use the ABC poem to teach kids the alphabet, but now they've put out a senior version.
Don’t Miss Out on Some Witty and Funny Single-Frame Comics
Enjoy this simple yet hilarious collection of single-panel comics by Nate Fakes.
Laughter Ahead: Read These Signs!
While not all of the 20 signs we’re about to show you intend to be funny, they definitely are!
6 Times Hotels Got the Details Hilariously Wrong
Hotels are usually pretty nice, but as you're about to see, you will sometimes come across some hilarious bloopers.
2:48
Big Cats Like Boxes Too!
As any cat owner well knows, cats LOVE sitting and playing with boxes! But are big cats the same way?
Why Men Take Risks That Make Us Laugh
Men are always hell-bent on cutting corners, and this usually means having a total disregard for health and safety. Take a look at these 28 photos.
3:24
Hilarious: How Cats are "Built" on the Inside
This is a really cool 3D project that is very funny and very accuarte at describing cats, and uses a really original way of doing it.
20 Funny Photos That Prove Men Are From Another Planet
Men really do some odd things, to the point where some are led to believe that they actually come from another planet! Take a look at these hilarious photos.
These Restroom Signs Turn Bathroom Breaks Into Laughs
These funny bathroom signs will leave you in splits!
FUNNY: When Animals Forget They're Supposed to Be Normal
Here's a a fun collection of animal pictures to make your day.
The Honest (and Hilarious) Side of Marriage
These absolute truths about marriage will really crack you up!
Funny Single-Panel Comics to Lift Your Mood
Sometimes, a single panel of a comic strip can contain so much wit and humor, and these one frame cartoons certainly prove it!
Can You Spot the Camouflaged Object In These Photos?
These funny photos are the definition of accidental camouflage - when people and things just happen to perfectly blend into their surroundings.
The Best Husbands Have the Silliest Sense of Humor!
Married women will be able to related to these. You ask your husband to do one simply thing, and they take it as an excuse to goof off. See 10 hilarious pics.
Hilarious: When Protest Signs Come Out in the Best Way
Some people like to think that holding up signs will achieve something, but others go to protests for a laugh. Here are 13 funny examples.
Nice Try, Bakers! But These Cakes Failed Hilariously
We're not saying that all the cakes we're about show you look or taste bad, but they all have a flaw in them that's terrible yet absolutely hilarious at the same time
The Funniest Grocery Shopping Memes We Saw This Month
10 witty and funny shopping memes that get encapsulate the grocery shopping experience to a T.
165 of the Funniest Signs People Actually Posted
These signs are each funnier and more bizarre than the last. What were these people thinking?
5:30
If Moms Had Written Bohemian Rhapsody, It'd Be Like This...
Church on the Move take the classic song "Bohemian Rhapsody" and add their own hilarious twist to it. You really need to give it a watch.
To enable your Ad-Free Subscription, please fill the fields below
Your subscription was successful, now you can enjoy an ad-free experience!! Note: To make sure you get no ads, please make sure to log in to your account. If you are logged in already, then refresh the page. The subscription can be cancelled at any time.
