"It’s easy to meet expenses, everywhere we go, there they are." ~ Anonymus
"The safe way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your pocket." ~ Kin Hubbard
“If there is anyone to whom I owe money, I’m prepared to forget it if they are.” - Errol Flynn
“Money can’t buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it." ~ David Lee Roth
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.” – Mark Twain
“What’s the use of happiness? It can’t buy you money." ~ Henny Youngman
“All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy." ~ Spike Milligan
“The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.” – Kin Hubbard
“A fool and his money are lucky enough to get together in the first place.” — Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) Wall Street
“If there is a WILL, there are 500 relatives.” – Anonymous
“I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died” — Malcolm Forbes
“Money’s only something you need in case you don’t die tomorrow." ~ Martin Sheen
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy beer." ~ Gary Reilly
“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage” — James Holt McGavran
“If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it." ~Author Unknown
"They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it." ~ Joseph Addison
“I’m spending a year dead for tax reasons.” Douglas Adams.
“They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it.” Joseph Addison.
“If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people he gave it to.” —Dorothy Parker
“Cocaine is God’s way of saying you’re making too much money.” – Robin Williams
“Someone asked me why women don’t gamble as much as men do, and I gave the commonsensical reply that we don’t have as much money. That was a true and incomplete answer. In fact, women’s total instinct for gambling is satisfied by marriage.” – Gloria Steinem
“Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with." ~From a Washington Post word contest
“Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.” —Addison H. Hallock
“Saving is a very fine thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.” – Winston Churchill
“Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache” – Mae West
“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.” – Bob Hope
“If only God would give me a clear sign, like making a large deposit in my swiss bank account." ~ Woody Allen
"If you can count your money, you don’t have a billion dollars." ~ J. Paul Getty
“Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.”— Will Rogers
“Money isn’t the most important thing in life, but it’s reasonably close to oxygen on the “gotta have it” scale." ~Zig Ziglar
“I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can’t get killed by a blank?” — Milton Berle
"Money is like a sixth sense – and you can’t make use of the other five without it." ~ William Somerset Maugham
“I rob banks because that’s where the money is.” Willie Sutton.
“I’m so poor I can’t even pay attention." ~Ron Kittle
“If you owe the bank $100 that’s your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that’s the bank’s problem.” -JP Getty.
“If all the economists were laid end to end, they’d never reach a conclusion." ~George Bernard Shaw
“When I was young I thought money was the most important thing in life; now that I’m old, I know it is." ~ Oscar Wilde
“If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." ~Aristotle Onassis
“Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That’s how rich I want to be.” – Rita Rudner
“I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries.” – Jules Renard
“Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.” — Steven Wright
“Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.” – Robert Orben
"I despise the lottery. There’s less chance of you becoming a millionaire than there is of getting hit by a passing asteroid." ~ Unknown
“Money is something you have to make in case you don’t die.” Max Asnas.
“Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.” – Jackie Mason
“What’s the use of happiness? It can’t buy you money.”- Henry Youngman
"Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due." ~Author Unknown
“Money isn’t everything, but it’s a long way ahead of what comes next.” - Edmund Stockdale
“I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.” — Shaquille O’Neal
“A father is someone who carries pictures in his wallet where his money used to be” — unknown