“The trick is to stop thinking of it as ‘your’ money.” – IRS auditor
"The safe way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your pocket." ~ Kin Hubbard
“In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.” –Tony Montana (Al Pacino) Scarface
“A father is someone who carries pictures in his wallet where his money used to be” — unknown
“People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.”—Joan Rivers
“A fool and his money are lucky enough to get together in the first place.” — Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) Wall Street
“Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt." ~ Herbert Hoover
“Someone asked me why women don’t gamble as much as men do, and I gave the commonsensical reply that we don’t have as much money. That was a true and incomplete answer. In fact, women’s total instinct for gambling is satisfied by marriage.” – Gloria Steinem
“People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.” ~ Joan Rivers
“I owe much; I have nothing; the rest I leave to the poor.” - Francois Rebelais
"If you can count your money, you don’t have a billion dollars." ~ J. Paul Getty
"Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to go shopping." ~ Bo Derek
“October: This is one of the particularly dangerous months to invest in stocks. Other dangerous months are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.” Mark Twain
“Undermine the entire economic structure of society by leaving the pay toilet door ajar so the next person can get in free.” - Taylor Meade
“A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to us than the 99 which we had to work for, and the money won at Faro or in the stock market snuggles into our hearts in the same way. ~Mark Twain
“They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it.” Joseph Addison.
“There were times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.” -Spencer Tracy quotes
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy beer." ~ Gary Reilly
“Money isn’t everything, but it’s a long way ahead of what comes next.” - Edmund Stockdale
“If there is anyone to whom I owe money, I’m prepared to forget it if they are.” - Errol Flynn
"If hard work were such a wonderful thing, surely the rich would have kept it all to themselves." ~ Lane Kirkland
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson
"If all the rich people in the world divided up their money among themselves, there wouldn’t be enough to go around." ~ Christina Stead
“The economy depends about as much on economists as the weather does on weather forecasters." ~Jean-Paul Kauffmann
“Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.” - Jenny McCarthy
"Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy." ~ Groucho Marx