“You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘Wow, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!’”—Dave Barry
“In LA we get coyotes in our garbage cans. Coyotes are just like my relatives. They go out in pairs, they whine at night, and they go anywhere there’s food."
- Billy Crystal
“The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He’s got a little bit of a Barney Fife quality to him.”
- Jeff Foxworthy.
“If I'm ever being chased by a giraffe I'm gonna run into a place with low ceiling fans. Sorry, giraffe, but I gotta do what's best for me."
- Amber Tozer
“We’ve all done this because we’re so mature. You see a cow on the side of the road, stick your head out the window and go, “Mooooo!” Like we expect the cow to think, “Hey, there’s another cow, driving that car! How can he afford that?”
- Garry Shandling.
“The happiness of the bee and the dolphin is to exist. For man, it is to know that and to wonder at it.”
- Jacques Yves Cousteau.
“One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."
- Groucho Marx
“No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens." - Abraham Lincoln
“My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am.” ~ Unknown
“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”
- Andy Rooney.
“Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.”
- Ann Landers.
“The best thing about animals is that they don’t talk much.”
- Thornton Wilder.
“Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet.”
- Colette.
“Anytime you see a turtle up on top of a fence post, you know he had some help."
- Alex Haley
“My relationships with my cats have saved me from a deadly, pervasive ignorance.”
- William S. Burroughs.
“Saw a chameleon today so I'm assuming it wasn't a very good one." - Unknown Author
“A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution.”
- Hazel Nicholson.
"Dogs never bite me. Just humans."
- Marilyn Monroe