“I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.”
― Unknown
“Being a beaver is nice, if you’re hungry you just eat a piece of your home.”
― Unknown
"Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie."
— Jim Davis
"Snack time heals all wounds."
— Bridger Winegar
“Love and sausage are alike. Can never have enough of either.”
— Trixie Koontz
“Pizza is like the entire food pyramid!”
― Madeline Oles
"You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans."
— Ronald Reagan
"Anything is good if it's made of chocolate."
— Jo Brand
"I just want someone to look at me the way I look at food."
— Unknown
"Never trust a skinny cook."
– Iain Hewitson
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
"I'm not sure what makes pepperoni so good if it's the pepper or the oni."
— Ulrik Stephens
"If we shake out all of the crumbs from all of the keyboards in the world, we can end world hunger."
— Matthew Dolkart
"We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie."
– David Mamet
"I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks."
— Totie Fields
"I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food."
— W.C. Fields
"Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It’s a grain. It’s like, like, grits, but with high self-esteem."
– James Patterson
“Red meat is not bad for you. Now, blue-green meat—that’s bad for you!”
— Tom Smothers
"Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one of the pieces."
— Judith Viorst
"Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults."
– Mitch Hedberg
“Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.”
― Andrew W.K.
“You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself.”
― Unknown
"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found."
— Calvin Trillin
"Life is too short for self-hatred and celery sticks."
– Marilyn Wann
"If I hold a can of soda up to my ear and listen carefully, I can hear my bones pleading for a glass of milk."
– Bridger Winegar
"Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don't forget food. You can go a week without laughing."
— Joss Whedon
“Abs are temporary. Chocolate is forever.”
― Unknown
"I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon."
— Ellen DeGeneres
“When life hands you lemons, give them back. You deserve chocolate.”
― Unknown
“All my life I thought air was free until I bought a bag of chips.”
― Unknown