“I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it’s someone’s birthday and I like to celebrate.”
― Unknown
“A cookie a day keeps the sadness away. An entire jar of cookies a day brings it back.”
― Unknown
“If you know how many cupcakes I’m holding behind my back I’ll give you both of them.”
― Unknown
“An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.”
― Unknown
“I thought about losing weight once, but I don’t like losing.”
― Unknown
“How do I like my eggs? In a cake.”
― Unknown
“I’m like Pacman when I’m at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.”
― Unknown
“I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.”
― Unknown
“You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself.”
― Unknown
“Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.”
― Unknown
“Nutrition labels should include a “What if I ate the whole thing” section.”
― Unknown
“My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.”
― Henny Youngman
“All my life I thought air was free until I bought a bag of chips.”
― Unknown
“I have a passion for not cooking.”
― Unknown
“I didn’t get this physique by not eating tacos.”
― Jon Tester
“Little known fact, gentlemen. Tacos are the food of genius.”
― Heather Brewer
“Everything goes better with tacos.”
― Rachel Caine
“I thought I’d become an actress, but then I realized I eat too much.”
― Chelsea Handler
“When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets because stressed spelled backward is desserts.”
― Unknown
“Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.”
― Unknown
“I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we’re having cake.”
― Unknown
“Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.”
― Unknown
“Where there is cake, there is hope. And there is always cake.”
― Dean Koontz
“A party without a cake is really just a meeting.”
― Julia Child
“I believe it’s a cook’s moral obligation to add more butter given the chance.”
― Michael Ruhlman
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz
“The key to my heart looks a whole lot like a plate of pasta.”
― Unknown
“Love means never having to say “Should we get dessert?”
― Unknown
“I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.”
― Unknown
“You only live once… Lick the bowl!”
― Unknown
“If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”
― Unknown
“My mind says ‘abs’ but my heart says ‘cheese fries’.”
― Unknown
“Every day is National Donut Day if you put your mind to it.”
― Unknown
“The only clubs I’m interested in are sandwiches.”
― Unknown
“Abs are temporary. Chocolate is forever.”
― Unknown
“There’s no “we” in ice cream.”
― Unknown
“A pizza slice a day keeps sadness away.”
― Jet Paacal
“Those pizzas I ate were for medicinal purposes.”
― Amy Neftzger
“Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.”
― Andrew W.K.
“Every pizza is a personal pizza if you try hard and believe in yourself.”
― Bill Murray
“Pizza is like the entire food pyramid!”
― Madeline Oles
“Unless you are a pizza, the answer is yes, I can live without you.”
― Bill Murray
“You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not pizza.”
― Unknown
“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
― Anthony Bourdain
“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart.”
― Erma Bombeck
“Red meat is not bad for you. Now, blue-green meat—that’s bad for you!”
— Tom Smothers
“Love and sausage are alike. Can never have enough of either.”
— Trixie Koontz
“The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.”
— John Walters
"I just want someone to look at me the way I look at food."
— Unknown
"I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge."
— Unknown