Anti Pick Up Lines

The complete opposite of pick up lines - Insulting instead of complimenting!

Anti Pick Up Lines

If I could rearrange the alphabet I’d move U.
Because you’re blocking the TV.
Roses are red
Violets are cheaper
If I leave silent voicemails
Please don’t call me a creeper.
My fridge is hotter than you.
Do you like wine?
Because that's all your doing.
How much does a Polar Bear weigh?
I don't know.
About ten pounds less than you, fat-ass.
You're like Newton's laws.
Not perfect, but good enough.
I'd like to get you wet. At least long enough to get you back to the ocean.
So how many cats do you have?
Except the direction I'm walking in.
Girl, I know your wearing Nike, but I just won't do it.
Are you a banker?
Because you need to leave me a loan.
Hey girl, are you a broom?
Why, because I swept you off your feet?
No, because you're really hairy.
Do you have a mirror in your pocket?
Why, because you can see yourself in my pants?
No, because I wanted to check how I look before I hit on your hot friend.
If I could rearrange the alphabet...
I'd leave it the way it is.
There's something gorgeous about your eyes...
Oh, that's it! It's my reflection.
Are you the sun?
Because you should stay 93 million miles away from me.
Are you a cigarette?
Because when I'm done with your butt I'm gonna throw it away.