Anti Pick Up Lines

The complete opposite of pick up lines - Insulting instead of complimenting!

Anti Pick Up Lines

When I see your face there's not a thing that I would change...
Except the direction I'm walking in.
Are you a cigarette?
Because when I'm done with your butt I'm gonna throw it away.
Has a guy ever walked up to you just to tell you how beautiful you are?
They must have been much drunker than I am.
Hey girl, are you a broom?
Why, because I swept you off your feet?
No, because you're really hairy.
From the moment I saw you, I knew I would be spending the rest of my life trying to avoid you.
Are there people following you?
Because I'm seeing someone behind your back.
Are you a fortune cookie?
Because you're always wrong.
Do you have a library card?
So you can check me out?
No, because my cat just died and I need to find a book about cat funerals.
Your name must be trigonometry, because you make me want to cry.
My fridge is hotter than you.
Are you from Tennessee?
Because you look inbred.
Are you a lumberjack?
Why, because I give you wood?
No, because you have masculine forearms and you're wearing Wranglers jeans.
Do you have a mirror in your pocket?
Why, because you can see yourself in my pants?
No, because I wanted to check how I look before I hit on your hot friend.
Do you want to dance?
Yeah, sure.
Great, then I can sit there.
Your name must be Calculus Homework, because I have no interest in doing you.
Did the Lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?