How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
What is a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
What do you call a baby potato? Small fry.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
“How was your day? ” “It was tater-ible”
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
I yam always very happy to eat sweet potatoes.
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
Say this aloud: Eye Yam Stew Peed
Time fries when you’re having fun!
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
How do you know when a potato is high? When it looks baked!
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!