What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
Say this aloud: Eye Yam Stew Peed
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
Time fries when you’re having fun!
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
“How was your day? ” “It was tater-ible”
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
I like you a latke!
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
I love you a tot!
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
We’re a perfect mash.
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!