Drive

What type of car does a cowboy drive?
Audi partner.
What do you drive in a river? An otter-mobile.
What kind of car does an otter drive? A Furrari.
What did the teenage rock say after failing its drive test? I don’t want to talc about it.
How do a group of skeletons drive to work?
In the carpal lane.
Why can’t Helen Keller drive?
Because she’s dead.
Little Johnny and Jesus Christ
Little Johnny and Jesus Christ A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her students that she wanted each of them to have learned one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday. The following week she asked each child in turn what he or she had learned. Susie said, "He was born in a manger." Bobby said, "He threw the money changers out of the temple." Little Johnny said, "He has a red pickup truck but he doesn't know how to drive it." Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn that, Johnny?" "From my Daddy," said Johnny. "Yesterday we were driving down the highway, and this red pickup truck pulled out in front of us and Daddy yelled at him, 'Jesus Christ! Why don't you learn how to drive?'"
Why shouldn’t you let a geologist drive your car?
Because they get hammered and stoned.
What type of car does a cowboy drive?
Audi partner.
What kind of car did the heart surgeon drive to work?
A beater.
What do pigs drive? Pigup trucks.
What do you say when you want a flower to drive faster?
Floret.
Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.
What kind of car does a sheep drive?
A LAMBorghini
To Each Their Own Car...
To Each Their Own Car... Three guys are talking in a bar one day. They start talking about how their cars reflect their careers. The first guy says, "I'm a pimp and so I drive a cheap Escort." The second guy says, "I'm a herpetologist and so I drive a Dodge Viper." The third guy says, "I'm a proctologist, and I drive a brown Probe."
"Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy."
Why shouldn’t you drive with a vampire?
He will drive you batty.