“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
— George Carlin
“If you’re going through hell, keep going.”
— Winston Churchill
"Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were gonna do anyway."
― Robert Downey Jr.
"Know your worth, and then make sure to add tax."
“I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.”
– Benjamin Franklin
“Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.”
“The bags under my eyes are Prada.”
“Bad decisions make good stories.”
– Ellis Vidler
"I’m staying home today. I have mood poisoning."
"I’m so hot that I contribute to global warming."
"Don’t forget to drink water and get some sun. You’re basically a houseplant with more complicated emotions."
“When I hear somebody sigh, “Life is hard”, I am always tempted to ask, “Compared to what?””
– Sydney Harris
"They say good things take time, so that’s why I’m always late."
“Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.”
"I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful."
"Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood."
— Bill Murray
“Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.”
— Harvey Specter
“They laugh at me because I’m different: I laugh at them because they’re all the same.”
"Sometimes you just need to lie on the couch and read for a couple of years."
“Not everybody has to love me. I can’t force you to have good taste.”
“The road to success is always under construction.”
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing—that’s why we recommend it daily.”
— Zig Ziglar
“Let’s begin by taking a smallish nap or two.”
– A. A. Milne (Winnie the Pooh)
"Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including yourself."
— Anne Lamott
“Don’t worry if people think you’re crazy. You are crazy. You have that kind of intoxicating insanity that lets other people dream outside of the lines and become who they’re destined to be.”
— Jennifer Elisabeth
“Stretch marks are just rad lil’ lightning strikes here to remind you that you are a force of nature.”