“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive.”
“Monday should be optional.”
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“You are in control. Never allow your Monday to be manic.”
— Andrea L’Artiste
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”
“At the end of a rainbow, there’s a pot of gold. But when the weekend comes to an end, there’s only a Monday.”
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Mondays. Don’t worry, you’re regularly scheduled happiness will resume again on Friday.”
“Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“I hate mornings and Mondays. And working. But other than that I am entirely happy.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“I really don’t play well with others on a Monday. Can I skip today and just start again with Tuesday?”
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill