“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Mondays. Don’t worry, you’re regularly scheduled happiness will resume again on Friday.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“I hate mornings and Mondays. And working. But other than that I am entirely happy.”
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”
“Monday I shall slay thee with my mighty cup of coffee.”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“Good morning. Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“Monday should be optional.”
“Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Monday again? Is it every week now?”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive.”
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”