“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“Monday should be optional.”
“At the end of a rainbow, there’s a pot of gold. But when the weekend comes to an end, there’s only a Monday.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“I hate mornings and Mondays. And working. But other than that I am entirely happy.”
“Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll