“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Monday I shall slay thee with my mighty cup of coffee.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“You are in control. Never allow your Monday to be manic.”
— Andrea L’Artiste
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy