How do you fix a broken pizza?
With tomato paste.
What does a pizza say when it wants to cuddle?
Fold me close.
I have been trying to write a new pizza joke…
But I can’t work out the delivery.
I have so mushroom in my heart for you.
It’s time to think outside the pizza box.
What did the pizza say to the delivery guy?
“You don’t pepper-own me.”
…and what did the delivery guy say in reply?
“Hey now, don’t get saucy.”
What is a pizza’s favorite movie?
Pie hard.
Why was the pizzeria desperate for business?
Because they kneaded the dough!
What did the parmesan say when it broke up with the mozzarella?
Sorry but I am too mature for you.
What do pizza delivery guys and porn stars both see too much of?
Stiff tips.
Pizza: the only time top-less isn't fun
“Waiter, will my pizza be long?”
“No sir, it will be round!”
Why did the man go into the pizza business?
He wanted to make some dough.
Join us for a slice of fun.
What does a pizza wear to smell good?
Calzogne.
What type of person doesn’t like pizza?
A weir-dough.
This pizza party is the perfect topping to a great summer.
Join us and let’s make pizza cheese grate again.
Where do pepperonis go on vacation?
The Leaning Tower of Pizza.
Damn, look at that pizza! It's an over panchiever.
I burnt my Hawaiian pizza.
I should have used aloha temperature.
What did the pizza say when it asked the topping out on a date?
I never sausage a beautiful face.
What’s the difference between a delivery driver and the pizza they deliver?
The pizza can feed a family of four.
What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?
There’s mushroom for improvement.
What kind of pizza do you order on Christmas?
Cheeses Crust.
What does a pizza say when it introduces itself to you?
Slice to meet you.
How can you tell if you are in love?
If they stole a pizza your heart.
What does an anteater like on its pizza?
Ant-chovies.
What is the best way to stop a pizza curling?
Hide its brush.
Why does the mushroom always get invited to pizza parties?
Because he’s such a fungi!
the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes?
My pizza jokes can’t be topped!
Why did the hipster burn his lips?
He ate his pizza before it was cool.
Why does Satan not eat the bread part of the pizza?
Because he's the Anti-Crust!
What did the doughnut say to the pizza?
If I had as much dough as you, I wouldn’t be hanging around this hole.
I had a goat’s cheese pizza the other day.
He wasn’t happy.
hat did the pizza slicer say when he wanted to rob the pizza?
“Hand over the dough or I’ll cut you!”
What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song?
Slice, Slice Baby
What did the pepperoni say to the cook?
You wanna pizza me?
You and I make a deluxe combo.
Did you hear about the Italian chef with the terminal illness?
He pastaway. Now he’s just a pizza history.
What do you call a sleeping pizza?
A piZZZZZZa.
How do you get a musician off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza.
What pizza do dogs eat?
Puperoni.