Trip Jokes

I think there'll be a ferry-tale ending to this trip.
It's always a first class trip with me.
When I went to the shop to buy some strawberries, they didn't have any. It was such a fruitless trip.
Full Permission Four guys have been going on the same fishing trip for many years. A few days before the group’s annual departure date, John’s wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn’t going. John’s fishing buddies are very upset that he can’t go, but what can they do? Two days later the three get to the camping site to find John sitting there with his tent set up, firewood gathered, dinner cooking on the fire, and drinking a cold beer. “Heck John, how long you been here, and how did you talk your missus into letting you go?” “Well, I’ve been here since last night. Yesterday evening, I was sitting in my recliner when my wife came up behind me, put her hands over my eyes, and asked, “Guess who?” I pulled her hands off, and there she was, wearing a nightie. She took my hand and pulled me into the bedroom, where she’d lit candles and put rose petals all over the place, looked like something out of a movie. Well, she’s been reading 50 Shades of Grey or something. On the bed she had handcuffs, and ropes! She told me to tie her up and cuff her to the bed, so I did. And then she said, ‘Honey, you can do whatever you want.’ So, boys, here I am!”
A trip to Ireland always lifts my spirits.
A trip to Ireland is quite a cliffhanger.
Took the family on a whitewater rafting trip, and first time we came to a sudden descent in the river, we lost everything...
That was just one of the downfalls!
Who cleans all the mess created by beavers after their beach trip? Mer-maids.
Hey baby, let me take you on a trip around the world.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
Let’s both be naughty and save Santa the trip tonight.
When the pig had a quarrel with his wife, he ended up having a gilt trip.
The science teacher decided to take her class out on a field trip to the mountains because all the kids in her class desperately needed higher grades.
Her Italian Vacation A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport. “Thank you honey,” she says, “Is there anything I can bring back for you?” He laughs, and says, “An Italian girl!” When the conference is over, he meets her up at the airport and asks, “How was the trip?” “Very good,” she replies. “And what happened to my present?” “Which present?” she asks. “The one I asked for - an Italian girl!” “Oh, that. I did what I could. We’ll just have to wait 9 months to see if it’s a girl.”
Some airplanes are so cramped that at the end of the trip, you suffer jet leg.
Once a year, I take my family on a tour of various nuclear facilities.
While my kids like it, my wife says it’s just a power trip.
I just saw my wife trip and fall, while carrying a laundry basket full of ironed clothes.
I watched it all unfold.
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