Paid

Stopped by a roadside stand that said lobster tails $2. I paid my $2 and he said...
Once upon a time there was this lobster...
There once was a hooker named Sue,
Who filled her va**na with glue.
When they paid to get in,
She said with a grin,
You must pay to get out of it too!
Yesterday I paid a stranger to knock me unconscious,
shove a foreign object up my butt and film the whole thing!
Or as my doctor insists on calling it... a colonoscopy
“Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.”
George Carlin
Did you know that doctors that perform circumscisions don’t make a lot of money for those operations?
They only get paid in tips.
What’s the difference between a football (soccer) referee and a politician?
When the referee gets paid at least someone wins.
There was an Old Person of Rhodes,
Who strongly objected to toads;
He paid several cousins,
To catch them by the dozens,
That futile Old Person of Rhodes.
What are porn stars paid?
Income.
The cheap baker only paid his employees a flourly rate. Cheapskate!
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