Menu

“As a child my family’s menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.”
Buddy Hackett
As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.
Buddy Hackett
As a child my family’s menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.
Buddy Hackett
The Rude Customer
The Rude Customer A man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly beautiful waitress came to his table. "What would you like, sir?" He looks at the menu and then looks at her, then answers, "A quickie." The waitress turns and walks away in disgust. After she regains her composure she returns and asks again, "What would you like, sir?" Again the man looks at her and answers, "A quickie, please." This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding "SMACK!" and storms away. A man sitting at the next table leans over and whispers... "Um, I think it's pronounced 'Quiche.'"
The Barman and the Jackass
The Barman and the Jackass I was sitting at a bar when a man walked in. The bartender pointed at the seat next to me and said “Hey Jackass! Sit here.” The man sat down. Then the bartender asked, “What do you want to drink, Jackass?” The man ordered a beer. A little later, the bartender yelled, “Hey Jackass! You want a menu?” The man said “No.” After a few more beers, the bartender said, “Hey Jackass! That will be $24.50.” The man paid and started to get up. I stopped him and asked, “Why does he keep calling you Jackass?” The man looked at me, smiled and said, “ Oh…. Hee Haw Hee Haw Hee Halways calls me that.”
Do you know what's on the menu tonight, girl?
Me 'n' U.
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu - you get what you deserve.
You know what’s on the menu? ME-N-U
Yo momma so fat when she goes to a restaurant she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.
I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech'ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter 'Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite'.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.